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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Is there a market day
or are you mocking me?
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:52, 1 reply, 16 years ago)
This is Norfolk, of course there is a market day
Not that I've ever ACTUALLY been. I'm only 31, and not actually a farmer
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:54, Reply)
Do they say oers
for 'hours' where you live?
I met this family on the train and the dad's name was Father.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:55, Reply)
I call my dad father sometimes
I've deeply disappointed him this weekend though for having the audacity to want to try and relax the night before my wedding with a couple of friends in the pub rather than having dinner with my ENTIRE extended family. I'm such a selfish cunt.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:57, Reply)
Can't he compromise and have a small close family dinner then let you go the boozer?

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:59, Reply)
It's actually my Mum who's kicking up a fuss about it
on my dads behalf. Apparently all my family have put in such an effort to get there. But nothing like the effort I've put in to organising the fucking wedding and paying for all of their dinners the following day.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:08, Reply)
Who is going to win?

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:10, Reply)
For the sake of avoiding a fight
I am having dinner with them and then leaving to go to the pub. But she still said I had a bad attitude about my acquiescence.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:15, Reply)
But on the bright side
you have a mum who knows what acquiescence means
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:16, Reply)
I'm sure she probably does, but those were my words, not hers

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:18, Reply)
Well she should be glad you're going

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:20, Reply)
I call my father 'father' or 'old boy'.
EDIT you fucking selfish cunt. I think you should be uninvited to your own wedding for that grotesque display of self-indulgence.

I am ashamed to know you.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:00, Reply)
No, but this was as though his name was Father
Mother of family to son: "Susan's asked Father to go as carer. She don't need a carer but if she nominates one, Father can get an extra place you see."

Very subtle difference, but the fact that she omitted the word 'your' before Father made me piss myself.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:04, Reply)
I've seen husband and wife refer to each other as Mother and Father
Itls not uncommon amongst the hoi-polloi.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:18, Reply)
I didn't think it still went on
And they said it in oo-arr voices.
How come Norfolk speak oo-arr, when they're miiiles away from Somerset and Devon and that?
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:19, Reply)
It's a different kind of oo-arr
The Norfolk patois also does this irritating thing where every sentence ends in a slightly higher tone of voice than that which preceded it. Makes it very hard to tell when someone's actually asking a question
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:22, Reply)
I do like the way they say 'oers'

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:24, Reply)
I can't stand the way they pronounce my first name though
Somehow they add an "E". And not the good kind of E. Makes me sound Dutch
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:27, Reply)
Or a doctor...

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:28, Reply)
Er, yeah
How do you know my secret identity?
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:37, Reply)
It's the only one I could think of
And I think someone mentioned your name once, but I could be imagining that
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:38, Reply)
Al did
Although he got it wrong at first. It's not much of a secret, several B3tans are FB friends with me.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:40, Reply)
Nope, not seen you on that

(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:43, Reply)
Look me up
All you have to do is guess my surname
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:44, Reply)
Haha
Rumpelstiltskin for the 21st Century
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:46, Reply)
With a significantly less satisfying payoff
I could leave you a trail of clues if you like
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:52, Reply)
There are many curious speech mannerisms
which I have taken great care to avoid obtaining
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:00, Reply)

Not that
ever ACTUALLY
only
not actually a an incredibly ugly inbred
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:56, Reply)
Oh you
*winks coyly*
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:00, Reply)
I visited Norwich once
and there was a fucking huge market on, some great army surplus stalls and a couple of good records and bootleg tape* sellers, too.

*shows how long ago this was.

I liked the town.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:56, Reply)
I can explain what happened there
Some time in the early 80s, you took some massive drugs, accidentally appeared as a contestant on Sale of the Century, and the above mentioned bric-a-brac is what you won.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:58, Reply)
Ah, I see.
Thanks for clearing that up for me.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:07, Reply)
It's not quite like that any more but it remains, essentially, a charming large market town
Unfortunately due to having a couple of Cathedrals and being the largest place for about a hundred miles in any direction it has aspirations to being a city
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:02, Reply)

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