Dearest wifey
Thought I'd tell you now, so, y'know, you don't get freaked out later. I was walking home last night, munching on a bag of Pork Scratchings, when I dropped one. Embarrassingly, my flies were undone, and the salty pub snack fell into my pants.

As if that wasn't bad enough, an urban fox leapt out of the bushes and went straight for the pork scratching. I tried throwing the bag at it, but he had his sights set on the one in my crotch. It all happened so fast, there I was floundering on the floor with a ginger whirlwind of terror biting and scratching at my groin! I managed to scare it off (I won't say how), but what I'm trying to say is that I won't be able to 'consummate' tonight, due to some vicious scratches and being 'spent'.

Sorry.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 10:45, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

an urban Megan
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 10:50, Reply)

He fucking wishes!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 10:52, Reply)