How was the crab racing?
Did yours win, or did it fall at the first hurdle?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:01, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

hilarious
It was really surreal - tortoises and crabs are not v bright or v quick it seems. This surprised me with the crabs as I thought they'd hoon it straight for the caribbean but no, they just sat there.

However this did not stop the boys, esp the merkins, from getting thoroughly overexcited. How many times can you scream "come on number two" at a crab that clearly has no intention of going anywhere?!

Edit - oh and thanks for the giant armoured spider image, pretty much all I could think of!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Glad it was fun
They tried snail racing at the local village fete a few years ago. They should be able to announce a winner by 2012.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:16, Reply)

just in time for the olympics then!
I love that you have a village fete. In london I just get monthly invites to help clear the local playgrounds of needles.

Did you make a cake/jam/honey??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:21, Reply)

I was tempted to join in the "Who can grow the biggest onion in a bucket" competition
but I thought that if I did that, I might as well go the whole hog and chew on a stalk of grass, give townies bad directions and marry my sister (not that I have one).

You can take the bumpkin out of the village, but you cant take the village out of the bumpkin.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:36, Reply)

ooo arr

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:40, Reply)

i am unhealthily intrigued
Why does the onion have to be grown in a bucket???
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:43, Reply)

Stops 'em turning into Triffids.
Really large ones can do that, but the bucket (and it ought to be a non-ferrous one) stops the dendritic proto-podia from forming properly, and that inhibits any further venomous developments. Ooo arr, s'tru dat.
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:53, Reply)

oh my word
that is farmerific.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 12:54, Reply)

You know what...
I have no idea!
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 20 Jul 2010, 14:10, Reply)