I suffered an attack of the runs in a nightclub once.
Made it to the toilet fine, but unfortunately all the beer I'd been drinking chose that moment to attempt an escape, and I was sick in my pants.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 10:51, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ah, the "one last defeat snatched from the jaws of victory" feeling.
*sympathies*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:00, Reply)

And then victory reclaimed!
All the sick stayed in my pants, I managed to remove them with minimal spillage, hid 'em in the cistern and then back to the dancefloor with no-one the wiser.

Except that I was hammered enough to find it hilarious so I told every... single... person I met for the rest of the evening.

Oh well.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:21, Reply)

So you went home alone then?

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:30, Reply)

In this respect it was no different to any other night out.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:32, Reply)

You went home with me and Clendrix the other weekend :p

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:38, Reply)

This is true :)

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:43, Reply)

Ah but did you reclaim them at the end of the night,
or are they still there to this very day...?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:31, Reply)

And, in the dark of night, clubgoers still talk of mysterious smells
and the sound of a ghostly cistern overflowing...
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:41, Reply)

"Woo-oaa-woo-oaa-wooo, myst-ear-e-ous sme-ell!"
/Peter Andre
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:45, Reply)

haha
this isn't quite as effective in text but luckily I can imagine you telling it to me fairly deadpan and outraged I was being american and thinking trousers were pants
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:06, Reply)

Wookie's deadpan delivery...
...Would make this story funnier x10 IMHO.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:10, Reply)

I realise my post makes it seem I am imaginging
but he has told me in person and it was about 11 times funnier :p
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:11, Reply)