In edinburgh
I was OUTSIDE when Tourette's farted and it was so vile I ran back into the club and was almost sick on Nostrebor who said I looked pretty pale and when I told DG his wife had almost KILLED me he just laughed
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 10:54, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

She's a pro.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 10:59, Reply)

I did one outside once and my uncle nearly cried
And this woman, hearing what was going on and being all nice said "Well I can't smell a thing" and he said "Wind direction luv, it'll be along in a minute. It'll stick to yer EYES!!" and ran off.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:26, Reply)

POTD!
It'll stick to yer EYES!!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:30, Reply)

There's no middle ground y'see.
He says to me "Mate, yours either smell like Chanel to me, or they're melting my lungs. That's not right."
Then there was the time they all cleared out of my mother's house and Grandad came to the window just to stare at me like an angry god. They just went home. They didn't even wait for it to clear. My uncle came back briefly with Nana's cardie over his face, asking for his jacket. But then they were gone.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:33, Reply)

But you seem so harmless in person...
...they do say everyone has their dark side though.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:35, Reply)

Poor Grandad
He was so disappointed in me.
A few weeks later he fell over, but I'd had too much Red Bull and a hangover, so I filmed it instead of helping pick him up.
He called me a cunt.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:37, Reply)

I wish my family were like yours.
Mine are all either dead, or cunts.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:40, Reply)

Oh he's a cunt alright
And now I owe him money, so that makes me the bigger cunt.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 11:41, Reply)