I am deadly serious.
I've been thinking about it for years. I also considered writing a Roman army novel but there are millions of them and many of these are doubtless better than anything I could write.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:35, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Well if there are millions of them
Then the definitive one has yet to be written.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:38, Reply)

I suspect it won't be by me, sadly.
As a child I believed 'Eagle of the Ninth' by Susan Cooper to be the best, but there have been a number of excellent ones in recent years.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:46, Reply)

man, I had to read that book when I was about 8
for the county book quiz. We won, but the book was DULL
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:31, Reply)

I would buy both of those
I fucking love sausages and mustard

I went to Exeter Sausage and Grill the other night. Some very fine sausages, a good selection of mustards, and some excellent homemade chutneys.

You'd love it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)

I hope you'll take me there one day.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

indeed I will
I just hope it can stay in business. It's opened on a cursed premises.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Chutney > Mustard.
There, I've said it.
(Cave Duck, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

You swine.
I do love chutney (my WI market mother is a champion preserver) but no fucking way is it better than mustard, you bounder.

There. I've refuted it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:50, Reply)

they have their place
but I could do without chutney more easily than without mustard without a doubt.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:54, Reply)

Be sure to include this fine variety of skinless sausage in your tome
yankeepancake.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/dsc00539.jpg

Also, would it have a chapter or two dedicated to Black Pudding?
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)

Of course it would!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:49, Reply)

Sausage Jockey.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:54, Reply)

You have a most irksome habit of making me 'lol', young Jeffery.
Kindly desist forthwith.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 16:55, Reply)

Why don't you do a book about salt cellars?
I think you'd do that fantastically.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:01, Reply)

Now you are just being obtuse.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:10, Reply)

I thought you'd take that
As a condement!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:11, Reply)

*shakes head in disbelief*

You should be peppered with buckshot for that.

NOW I'M FUCKING DOING IT.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:15, Reply)

Have I gone too far?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:17, Reply)

'peppered'
Pfft.
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:18, Reply)

asSAuLTed.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:20, Reply)

I find salt cellars to be quite erotic.
Reading a book on them would have me on the vinegar strokes in no time.
(Cave Duck, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:21, Reply)

To the Mayo Clinic with you.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 17:27, Reply)