so i should put an ad somewhere, is that what you're saying?
first draft...

wanted: house-husband for high-maintenance, impractical female. must be able to kill spiders, change lightbulbs, look great in a pinny and nothing else, not fuck the cleaner or try on my underwear, drive my sportscar without looking like a tool, and put out a minimum of three nights a week with bonus editions at the weekend.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:23, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

When can I start?
I can't drive but everything else sounds fine.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)

Driving is piss-easy Monty, You'll be fine - especially if the car is an automatic.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:30, Reply)

an automatic a girly, open-top Merc.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:34, Reply)

it is a hard-top convertible thank you very much
and it is not girly. it is black and sleek and dangerous.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Dangerous because it has a woman driving it?
OOOOoooooooo
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:38, Reply)

*Pulls up a chair, this should be an entertaining exchange*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:39, Reply)

so much bitter frustration
once you've touched a real woman it will all just melt away, i promise.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Strangely, the Ignore link under your name is purple for some reason
It must be telling me something subconciously.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:48, Reply)

yes
it is telling you that you can't keep away, however hard you try.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:53, Reply)

You're right Swipe
But there're just too many differences between us. Besides, you have Monty moving in to look after your hovel.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:56, Reply)

tonight?!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)

*hands in notice immediately*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:44, Reply)

that sounds like an ideal job
where do we send applications?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:33, Reply)

you can't apply
you already have a wedding ring or will do!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:35, Reply)

damn it
just have to wait for Mrs V to earn enough so I don't have to work.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 10:38, Reply)