One Night in Hong Kong
A couple of years ago I went on holiday to Hong Kong. One night I ended up in a bar and pulled a Filipino bird. We got a taxi back to my hotel. By that time of the night I was pretty drunk and knackered. Not wanting to disappoint her, during the taxi ride back to my hotel I popped a little blue pill I'd picked up from a "traditional" Chinese pharmacy just in case of this situation occurring.

We got back to the hotel and got down to business. She was young, lithe and would've easily got my soldier standing to attention without the medicinal aid I'd used regardless of how drunk I was. Eventually she left, she was a domestic helper and had to return to her employers ready to start back at work the next day.

Being rather sweaty now after the fun we'd just had, I decided to clean myself up. I went into the bathroom, ran the taps and jumped in the tub. Unfortunately by this point the drunkenness combined with the relaxing-ness of the hot bath meant I quickly found myself needing the toilet. Adding to that I was still sporting an erection that would put a horse to shame well... long story short, I pissed in my own mouth.
(danishbacon is haram yes?, Thu 13 Mar 2014, 22:53, 13 replies)

That was rubbish.
Sorry, but it was.
( Ghoti Fingers, Thu 13 Mar 2014, 23:02, closed)

as a 'pissing in my own mouth' story goes
it wasn't that bad
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 11:03, closed)

Much as I enjoy the whole "pissed in my own mouth" meme,
I can't really get over the fact that an erection is generally an impediment to pissing.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 13 Mar 2014, 23:35, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/wrongness/post797698
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 9:58, closed)

Oh my.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 11:59, closed)

I miss the correctly spelt Ringo.
You could rely on him to come running to defence of any liar, perv or nonce you were mocking.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 12:22, closed)

Serious business,
this "internet".
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 19:21, closed)

See ... I don't really understand telling obvious lies on th'internet.
And I deffo don't understand defending those lies when people point out the obvious holes.

But to jump in and defend somebody else's obvious lies ... that's just fucking odd.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 15 Mar 2014, 11:02, closed)

This might explain the original lies..
www.lamebook.com/liar-liar/
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 18 Mar 2014, 22:05, closed)

And that joke
about the man being granted three wishes by a genie definitely didn't happen either it's all a conspiracy I tell ya
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 11:03, closed)

I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 14 Mar 2014, 12:29, closed)

Oh, very clever, nicking my post. Well done, Murray Bloody Head...

( Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Tue 18 Mar 2014, 1:09, closed)

Hope you paid her?
Domestic Helpers earn pitiful amounts of money in HK and you should have given her at least HK$1000 for her time. Just for reference you didn't pull her...
(Outtheresomewhere, Sat 15 Mar 2014, 10:16, closed)