This is just the start...
The "Alternative"

Now, I don't mean people who listen to rock music or dress in baggy jeans. I'm talking about the wank buckets who stand around in their little groups all looking as fucking rediculous as each other judging anybody who doesn't look like them or people they presume don't listen to the same music they do.

People going on at me to eat free range.

If a chicken is having a shitty life they're more likely going to want to die then if they were having a ball of a time running around in fields being all happy. I'd rather eat depressed suicidal chickens thanks, they're all going to die anyway, why give them false hope? That's my choice and I'm fucking sticking to it

People who spell you stupidly

yew, yoo or any other stupid way which isn't in any way shorter and looks completely rediculous. There is no point to it.

Topshop

Yes I have got fatter but that doesn't mean your jeans haven't got smaller. I can easily fit into the jeans I got from there a couple of years ago but now, the jeans that are the same size and the same style don't fit. Now, I'm a bit chubby but not obese yet the largest size don't fit. This is even weirder when the size smaller from Bench are too big. Not everybody is as skinny as Kate Moss, cater for people a bit bigger please. Incidently, Kate Moss is a cock monkey.

"The customer is always right"

FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF. WHEN YOU'RE WRONG YOU'RE FUCKING WRONG. Being a twat is going to make us stick to our desicion even more, we tend to bend the rules slightly for customers who are nice and treat us with respect.

Santa Claus

It's encouraging children to believe in bollocks, potentially will devestate them and makes kids think lying is ok.
(lei, Fri 2 May 2008, 12:11, 5 replies)

you get a click for the bit about Topshop
Add every single other high street store to that too.

Wait, maybe I HAVE got fatter.

Oh cock.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 2 May 2008, 12:24, closed)

The customer
is always a fucking idiot. 9 years in customer support teaches you this, along with an utter loathing of the general public
(Halfy By light alone, Fri 2 May 2008, 12:30, closed)

The customer *is* always right
Therefore, if someone comes along, and they are wrong, then they are obviously not a customer, and can piss off.
(Rastus P Watermelon, Fri 2 May 2008, 14:21, closed)

Santa Claus serves a purpose
He's like a microcosm of religion - if kids realise that adults lied about him, they will be more likely to question the existence of God and all the other bullshit that those same adults might try to drill into them.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Sat 3 May 2008, 14:14, closed)

people who spell 'you' in stupid ways
have a special place on my burn list. They could find a cure for cancer and I'll still think they're a thick cunt.
(and now for someone completely different, Mon 5 May 2008, 20:46, closed)