Apple Macs
I'm sure I won't be the first to kick off over these awful bloody 'my-first-computer' devices, here’s the shortlist:

The mouse only has one fucking button! The mouse on my PC has 5 different buttons AND a wheel! So, you want me to press a button on the keyboard to right click on something? Fuck off.

The way the windows scrunch up and slide off the bottom of the screen when you minimize them, it makes me feel like I’m going to be sick every time I see it.

The way icons bounce up and down in the task bar like the annoying kid in school that wants the teacher to pick them to answer the question, 'Oooh Miss! Miss! Miss! Pick me! Ooooh I’ve finally finished loading, oh oh oh look I’m so pleased with myself!'

The @ key ain't where it aught to be.

The way the desktop icons are just all over the place, when ever I use one I have to neatly line up all the icons down the left hand side before I can do anything else.

The way people on TV and in movies always seem to be using the bloody things and never a PC (I'm looking at you 'Sex in the City').

Those fucking Mitchell and Webb Mac adverts.

...In fact every single Mac advert ever made.

Mac People, the people who love them and go on and on about how they are so much better for Photoshop or video editing, they aren't, ok? They just fucking aren't.

iTunes? Fucking iTunes? Don't you know there are lots and lots of diffrent ways to download the same files for nothing?

iPods? Don’t get me started! You show me someone who has an iPod, uses it everyday, and has it still working after a year and I’ll show you a fucking liar.

I think that'll do for now, if I've left anything off please add more.

Length, Girth, Whatever.
(Dean, Fri 2 May 2008, 15:44, 13 replies)

nerd
thats all, just saying you are a nerd

nerd
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Fri 2 May 2008, 15:45, closed)

But
When I buy an Apple product, i'm not just buying a product, i'm buying a lifestyle choice. I haven't been happier since I joined the i-community.




of course I am joking
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Fri 2 May 2008, 15:51, closed)

On input devices for a mac
I much prefer to use a normal PC keyboard and mouse.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Fri 2 May 2008, 15:51, closed)

ipods
mine's a year and a month old (8GB nano aluminium casing) and still works a treat despite everyday use and multiple droppings.
(cannonfodder fodder for cannons on, Fri 2 May 2008, 15:56, closed)

a few responses...
os x allows the use of a right click button on pretty much any mouse you can throw at it, as well as other programmables and wheels and all sorts. all macs that come with a mouse have a mighty mouse, which has two top buttons, one on each side and a four way scroll ball. laptop mouse pads register a click with two fingers as a right click and moving two fingers in any direction as scrolling.

scrunching up icons? turn the genie effect. simple.

bouncing icons are like the orange blinking at the bottom of the screen in xp, same concept. if it bugs you that much, turn it off. sys preferences, dock, uncheck the box. hurrah...

surely just drag a box around all the icons and move them to the left... you can align to grid, just like in windows. plus, having the icons on the right means you can still access them when you're using a program on the left side of the screen.

i've seen plenty of windows computer with the @ above the 2. also, i've come across windows boxes where the @ and the " have decided to switch themselves around, so that pressing shift+2 give you an @ when it should give a ".

the os x graphics layer is better at compositing stuff than the windows one, ergo speedier rendering. fair enough, photoshop is the same, but run it in windows and os x on the same box and there's a difference in speed. and you can only get FCP on mac, where-as the best you can get for windows is avid, which is messy horrible shit.

iTunes is just fine for what it does, and there's plenty of other options for getting music for free on os x as well... not everyone wants to steal music (i don't have a problem with it, but i see the stand point).

my ipod mini served me for 2 or 3 hours of use a day for over 2 years, then i upgraded to an 80GB classic for the bigger storage space.

that's all, i think,
(notjustahatrack peeling a sausage..., Fri 2 May 2008, 15:59, closed)

^ What notjustahatrack said
Also, my three year old iPod is used every day (I have it hooked up to my car stereo) and is still going strong. It crashes occasionally, but it still works.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 2 May 2008, 22:26, closed)

i have to applaud notjustahatrack
i use macs because i am a creative have been so for 15 years now.

we tried listening to tight cunt employers who tried to fob us off with PC's that are 'just as good'

simply - they are not. We use the machine to do the job - were not techies we are paid enough to step back when stuff goes wrong and let the techies moan while they fix our machines - which compared to the crap plastic egg boxes the developers work on is rare

We just want an easy to use interface to create the stuff we do

Sorry I make more money than you for something that is intuitive natural and enjoyable to me - I get to play all day. and apple realise that and simple make it more fun for me.

Which is why they extended that deal to joe punter and why it took off a wee bit. We don’t care about your fucking file extensions we just want to use the cunting machine

the difference between a mac user and a pc jockey in my line is that when a mac fucks up the creative walks away in disgust until the geek squad arrive. a 'personal computer' goes tits up and all the geeks crowd round and say - ooh thats interesting.

pc = nerd
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Sat 3 May 2008, 2:02, closed)

I Hate MACS
Always have, always will. The main reason I hate them is there's no way to actually take control and make the machine behave the way *I* want it to. You have to do things the MAC way or no way.

On top of that is the dearth of software for the bloody thing.Fuck all games, fuck all in the way of network utilities. No decent development environments for programming and fuck all GPL applications.

And the fuckers crash with annoying regularity - much more than my PCs do. Probably because I try to make them do things that they're not capable of.

To be brutality honest, the most useful thing I can do with my MAC is have it run XP, Windows 2000 and various Windows servers. Oh - and LINUX. Virtual Box is fucking magic!

The reason I have a MAC is for testing web sites I write. I've given up entirely designing for SAFARI as it's probably the worst, most non-compliant browser in the world. But even FIREFOX for the MAC doesn't work the way it should. The MACS JAVA implementation is fucked - most JAVA apps fail miserably when you try to run them on a MAC. It also fucks up javascript.

That said, I have to say the fucks are stunning to look at. They look nice, are well built and the multi-media capabilities are better than all but the high-end PC's.

These days, the main thing I use the MAC for is to play DVDs. It does that fairly well.

And you say "nerd" as if that's a bad thing. I'm proud to be a geek and a nerd. I make things work when they go wrong - not throw my hands up in horror and have a hissy fit and wait for real men to come and sort *your* problems out.

Creative = nancy-boy

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sat 3 May 2008, 5:19, closed)

I hear you brother.....
Macs do indeed royally suck ass, apart from the reasons you mentioned, they cost a fuckload more than PC's, they aint as powerful, and there's no fecking software for em. Oh and mac haters AREN'T nerds, we just have at least an ounce of sense.
(Howling_Mad Gave God the finger on:, Sun 4 May 2008, 6:18, closed)

What is a
"creative"? Is this some nancy job title or something?
(conby whinemoansleep, Sun 4 May 2008, 18:12, closed)

the worst thing is when a mac user says
"but we don't get viruses"
and you have to resist the temptation to scream at them "NEITHER DO I, BECAUSE I CAN USE A COMPUTER!"
(09824739yhsidfhshfgq8weeq3e1, Mon 5 May 2008, 11:49, closed)

Apple Mac are the evil scientologists of the computer world.
Hey! All you Mac fans out there!

You know how well Macs are designed and how Mac cares for its community of arty types?

Go and start a thread on apple.com technical support about there possibly being a problem with the 20" and 22" flatscreen monitors for the G5 series. Within the hour, the thread will be deleted by an admin.

Of course, if you like this kind of evil scientology style business practice, I'm not going to stop you spending 1500 quid on a useless new Mac. BTW: Apple Mac have cutely not heard of exchange rates. A 1500 dollar Mac is 1500 quid in the UK. Suits the mental ability of its target market I suppose ...
(CerberaSpeedTwelve, Mon 5 May 2008, 14:05, closed)

I have a 3G
15gb ipod and after replacing the battery for £1.90 from ebay 6 months ago, it still works fine and entertains me to and from work every day!
(gin'll fix it, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:13, closed)