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Bob de Bilde says: A traffic warden threatened to call the police and have me arrested because "It's illegal to take photos in the street. You might be a paedophile". I was taking a picture of a funny street sign, over which I had no plans to masturbate. Tell us about petty officials talking bollocks.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2014, 15:05)
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So there I was, sleeping, as I tend to do at half past two on weekdays. Suddenly, Beeper! Hazmat!
Off I rush to the fire station, and once there I am told to "Get Peter, he's at work." Said Peter works for the company who's truck was involved, so it was assumed that he had some sort of helpful info. Off I went in our nice Golf GTD (Protip to fire departments: Car dealerships can be thankful), blasting down the Autobahn at 230kph. There was some construction, with the normal three lanes reduced to two, but I'd driven through there only hours ago and nobody was on the road, so I kept my speed up. It was actually quite fun, since our Fire law says (in part, and paraphrased) "Anything that furthers the legal duties of a fireman is legal".
I was almost through the construction when it happened. Red flash. "Yup, speed trap," thought I. "No worries, got me flashers on."
Everything went well on the call, we finished up at about daybreak. I came home exhausted, only to find a cop car in my driveway. The two cops got out, and presented me with a picture I recognized: A blaze-orange Golf GTD, with "Feuerwehr" written back-to-front on the hood. Complete with air horns and light bar. There was a man in the driver's seat, and he was wearing a yellow-black-reflective stripes outfit.
"We're taking you down to the station," they said.
"We called the fire department, they said it was you driving, and you certainly look like the guy in the picture," they said.
"220 in an 80? You'll never drive again," they said.
"Fuck off. I had my lights on, you can even see it in your stupid picture," quoth I, and went inside for coffee.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 4:22, 16 replies)
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We should have Dresden'd you lot back to the stone-age.
Just saying like.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 5:38, closed)
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an actual story. not a pointless pun. not a repetitive and deathly dull tirade against trolls and no YOUN MORE UPSET. not someone trying to censor the website so that it only contains stuff of which they approve. a story.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 9:52, closed)
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but every time anyone tries to post anything, they get a tonne of bricks down on them. shambles and AB should be forced to spend a whole week being sunny and nice to people. i think it might kill them.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:00, closed)
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I'm the cheeriest motherfucker anybody is likely to meet.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:23, closed)
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7 days of posting nothing but caring, supportive or fluffy replies.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:30, closed)
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Why would I pander to the desperate crybaby doppers on here?
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:33, closed)
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a personal quest, to find the inner fluff
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:36, closed)
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I don't need to find my inner fluff. I just don't see any need to waste it on the tragic subhuman dulls on here.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 10:46, closed)
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i understand that the idea of having to be nice to people terrifies you. it's ok, peaches. it's ok.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 11:02, closed)
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Christ. You've been here long enough to know that.
( , Mon 31 Mar 2014, 11:05, closed)
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