Zombies
I'm terrified of zombies. They eat your brains. My mum says they're more scared of me than I am of them, but I know she's just saying that to make me feel better.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:34, 11 replies)

Ah, but what is worse...
...a fast Zombie, or a slow one?

I'd say slow. They have this kind of shuffling inevitability about them...
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:35, closed)

yeah
the erratic movement, the lolling (not the lol-ing) tongue...
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:36, closed)

Now, there's a subject for an image challenge
Lol-zombies.

I'm in yur brainz, eating your brainz. Braaaainnnzzz!
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:39, closed)

It's ok
I have seen very very many zombie movies, and if they ever attack I can provide zombie extermination services for a reasonable rate for anyone who quotes 'b3ta' when they ring me for a quote.

We only deal with zombies using our humane cementmixerfullofhandgrenades™ method, so no need to worry about the critters.
(oeb, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:40, closed)

Before my daily
Trip to the pub today, I went to a hardware shop, to buy myself a hatchet.

It's now in my desk drawer, just in case zombies happen.

This is 100% true, although I wish it wasn't :(
( Cawl, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:45, closed)

Zombies
All you need do is spend a couple of hours walking round Lakeside Shopping Centre during a bank holiday weekend and you're surrounded by meandering crowds of barely alive, shambling, slow witted zombies all slowly repearing the same words as they shuffle round aimlessly.

"Wooooooooooolworths...."
"Innit...."
"Fahhhhhhhhkin' IKEA"

Honestly, there's hordes of the buggers. They all seem to congregate in groups right in front of the shelf you want to get to, but stare back at you with empty, lifeless eyes when you politely say "excuse me please".

To make matters worse, I have evidence that they're multiplying.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:48, closed)

fast zombies are blatantly worse than slow
a slow zombie will give you a chance to grab the trusty shovel and bash the crap out of it, whereas a fast one....

you'd be struggling to cock the boomstick before it was on you!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:49, closed)

^^
If you are gonna be hitting them with Axes PMJ I hope you are officially licensed!
(oeb, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 14:49, closed)

In a similar style
to the XKCD comic about assessing houses against the risk of raptor attack I genuinely assess most buildings I enter as to how defensible they would be against the rising of the living dead.

I think about zombies more than a normal person should. They worry me.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 1:27, closed)

Zombies
No I agree, many years ago a pc magazine gave away a free game that ran on the half life engine called "they hunger". My then housemates spent many a happy hour playing the bloody game giggling as I cowered upstairs.
My love made me go to the cinema to watch "Land of the Dead" how I didn't run screaming from said cinema amazes me to this day
( hedge_diver, Fri 11 Apr 2008, 22:06, closed)

GAH!
yep. if this QOTW werent so full already this would have been my answer. the only zombie flick ive ever watched end to end was shaun of the dead, a comic parody. and even that bent my head for weeks. if i start thinking about zombies when im alone and its dark, i cant relax till i have a carving knife. im a male in my 30s. oh, the shame.....
(lazy killer robot found that beer tastes better when your older, Wed 16 Apr 2008, 6:54, closed)