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This is a question What's the hardest you've tried to get dumped?

Groovypoodle writes, "My mate once told his girlfriend that he didn't think it was working only for her to laugh and tell him he was hilarious. Saying she was 'too weird' and 'slightly violent' and that he didn't like her was equally hilarious. Ripping off her wing mirror, throwing it through the windscreen
and storming off in a huff merely generated an apology from her a week later..."

Just how hard have you had to work to get someone to take the hint and stay dumped?

(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 10:33)
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I performed
the Angry Pirate. Dumping followed swiftly after.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:29, 18 replies)
It's
Very effective, isn't it?
(GirlOfTheWorld, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:51, closed)
~curious to know~
What's the angry pirate??
(I helped save b3ta! vix0r was not Matthew on, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:55, closed)
umm
whats the angry pirate please?
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:55, closed)
Courtesy of "glossaryofperversion.com"
Angry Pirate - "This is where you proceed to perform a "Houdini" on someone. With exquisite aim, you launch your load into their eyeball. You then swiftly kick them in the shin and run for the nearest exit. As you look back over your shoulder, it will look like you are being chased by a one-eyed, one-legged "Angry Pirate"".
(Milo Minderbinder, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:57, closed)
Eek
I was an angry pirate in my 'dumped' QOTW story, but I certainly didn't do THAT!
(GirlOfTheWorld, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:58, closed)
^^I think I'll file that
under "too much information by far"
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Mon 9 Jun 2008, 14:59, closed)
Arabian Goggles did it for me, once.
And let's not even talk about Gibboning. :)

Or the Spiderman, for that matter.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 15:38, closed)
go on then
what's gibonning, and whats the spiderman.

Arabian Goggles made me laugh mind.
(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:10, closed)
like the angry dragon?
except there it's in their mouth and then you karate chop them on the back of the neck so it streams out of their nostrils, making them look like an....
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:25, closed)
^^
I can't believe that anyone actually does these things.

Do they? surely not.
(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:28, closed)
I'm still waiting
for the chance to perform the Tony Danza.
(I helped save b3ta! The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:34, closed)
which is?

(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:36, closed)
Per Urban Dictionary
When you are giving it to a chick from behind, you yell out "Who's the boss?" She'll get confused, turn her head around, at this moment, you donkey punch her in the face and then scream TONY DANZA!!!

========================================

...and no, I don't think the time will ever be right to perform this one.
(I helped save b3ta! The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:38, closed)
a definite MFOTFABL
moment.

I agree, there is never a good time for that. Especially if they don't know who Tony Danza is.
(I helped save b3ta! Bazongaloid, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 16:39, closed)
OK...
Please bear in mind that I have never done either of these (although I know a chef who claims to have done so...):

Gibboning: You, er, mount your beloved in the fashion of the dog. Then, you grab a handful of his or her hair, and drop a piece of raw bacon in to his or her mouth. The resultant gag reflex makes his or her whole body tense and release, while you repeatedly punch him or her in the kidneys.

Spiderman: Again, assume the doggy position. Have fun! Then, at the vinegar strokes, pull out and 'arrive' in your hand. Then, spit on his or her back, making them think you've finished. when they turn around, fling your ejaculate in their face, while shouting 'Go, web, go!"

I feel dirty now. These tidbits brought to you by the guy who once crept up on me and said "Hey, Devil... Have you ever smeared your nuts with petfood and shouted the dog in?"

Barf.
(I helped save b3ta! Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 17:02, closed)
How about doing the irate girlfriend.
Just as their about to come you grab them by the balls, punch them in the mouth and say 'and don't even think about doing that weirdo sex shit on me sunshine'.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 19:22, closed)
I have the worrying feeling
that if my boyfriend tried any of these on me I would just find it hysterically funny.
(I helped save b3ta! Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Mon 9 Jun 2008, 19:51, closed)
In response to Mr Loon
I once showed my girlfriend who the boss was, I took her to a Bruce Springsteen concert.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 10 Jun 2008, 9:47, closed)

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