Kids
There's no power as absolute as a parent over their children. Unfortunately, my lot all live with their mum, so it's all too common to hear her influence on their lives above my own ideals. Not that this causes many problems. The ex and I are very similar with ideals that tend to match. I often wonder what goes on behind closed doors though.

Over the weekend my youngest daughter handed me her school report. Being in Year 1, this is her first end-of-year report, and though not exceptional she was none-the-less proud of it and asked me to read it out so that her brother and sisters could hear.

Being a good dad, as I reeled off the various things she had done throughout the school year, surprised by the three sides of A4 on the report which differed immensely from the coupled of scribbled sentences I received at the same age, I decided to ask questions based on what I was reading.

"So you learnt about different religions this year, can you remember which ones?"

Youngest daughter tilted her head to one side which she does to aid her thought process and replied simply: "Christianity?" in that answer-posed-as-a-question way that kids tend to adopt.

"Yeah, that's one. Can you think of any more?"

She shook her head and before I could prompt her for more answers, her sisters joined in.

"Judaism!" chimed in the eldest, who is 9 years old.

"Good! Any more?"

"Hinduism?" offered the middle daughter, aged 7.

"Excellent! There's a few more that you learnt about, can anyone remember any more?"

There was a silence as they all racked their brains. I decided to help out, and recounted their answers so far, and added an additional one.

"Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism..." my sentence petered out and I sat back, waiting proudly for my daughters to come up with even more religions than I knew when I had left school.

"I know!" shouted the eldest one excitedly, "sexism!"

And that was the end of learning over the weekend in the SeasonTicketless household. It's good to see the absolute power that my ex is exuding in my absence.
( SeasonTicketless is too often the statue, and rarely the pigeon., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:52, 17 replies)

Haaaaaaaaaaahahahahhahaha
"Religion?"

"Oh - I'm a Racist."
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:27, closed)

No, don't do that!
You'll catch on that we write nonsense in a year 1 report.
I mean really, what do you want to know at the end of year 1?
They can read a bit, write a bit and add a bit. They are happy and well behaved. End of report.

But that's not good enough, we have to write about three sentences about everything. Truth is that they are copied and pasted with the names and gender changed.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 17:44, closed)

Speak for yourself.
I wrote each of mine individually.

Up yours.
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 18:59, closed)

Is this the difference between teachers who actually give a shit about teaching,
and teachers who only did a PGCE when they realised that getting a job with their first degree would be quite difficult?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:07, closed)

yes i think this is essentially it

(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:07, closed)

You're an arse-licker.

( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:16, closed)

Fancy them expecting you to do your job professionally.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:17, closed)

mid life crisis pgce teacher right here Shambles
will be out of the profession in a few years, nevermind
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:22, closed)

A few years is a hundred odd kids who lose a year of education because they're trapped in a room
with somebody who was shit at one career so ran away to a career that's harder and more important.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:25, closed)

I remember being told that teaching is vocation, not just a job.
After being a teacher 7 years I can see why. It's fucking difficult and you only get out what you put in. It's also really easy to become jaded, especially if you're losing enthusiasm for your subject.
(Happy Little Cupcake desires macaroni pictures., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 19:59, closed)

Yes, the most important part of teaching is definitely the questionable requirement to fill in largely useless forms. I don't know how anyone ever got an eduation before this was made mandatory.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 22:19, closed)

My youngest's school report has a great line in it
She's 5 and has some problems with learning, but God forbid the school admits she's got nowhere, hence the following classic phrase repeated against several subjects:

"She is about to make progress..."

Just out of interest, how do they know?
( Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 22:08, closed)

My daughter's report tells me she's "Working towards the expected standard" in virtually every subject.
Except dancing. She likes dancing.
(WillI'mNot logs in twice a year, every year, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 0:14, closed)

Yeah
but it's either that or the teacher tells you your child is slow at learning and not keeping up. That wouldn't look good, therefore she is 'about to make progress'.

I'd rather say that than "Er, hate to say it, but your kid can't add up yet. Sorry. I'll try harder next year."
( Bats, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 9:07, closed)

Hmmm
Yeah, that sounds about right. There's also a lot of what the class did as opposed to what my daughter has achieved as part of what the class did.

Parents evening is much better for getting feedback, I find.
( SeasonTicketless is too often the statue, and rarely the pigeon., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 7:55, closed)

So to sum up all the comment above.
I think I'll send my kid to the best school I can and make sure I get home tutor with big tits to keep him interested in "any" subject she teaches.

UK schools are still shite it seems.
(waxdart hello., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 10:47, closed)

!
Kids say the darndest things.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:15, closed)