Pub Monkey
Quick Question.

Has anyone, other than me, been visited after the pub by the Invisible Pub Monkey?

He's the one who throws your clothes all over the house, destroys the kitchen, rifles your wallet (you went out with fifty quid, had 7 pints and now have 7p left), sends *highly* inappropriate texts from your phone at 3am and then shits in your mouth and leaves.

Or is it just me?

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 11:17, 8 replies)

see my last post
i think the monkey is me. sorry about that. btw, when clearing the shit from your mouth, you didn't perchance find a house key did you? swallowed it for a bet, now i'm stuck outside in the snow. bastard.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 11:19, closed)

After
reading a few of your recent posts I fear that you could well be right.

You may be the physical avatar of the Invisible Pub Monkey.

You should start your own religion.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 11:24, closed)

i like the sound of that
i always hankered after minions...
remember, you heard it here first.

all hail loaf the messiah! hail dammit! STOP walking away from me dammit, i shall smite thee!! *smites feebly*
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 11:26, closed)

Mine likes to start online games
then wander off.

I woke up this morning to find he'd joined a game of Conqueror but then got bored and left it running. He also put "Me and the minibar" by Dresden Dolls on repeat in winamp. Just that one song. Still playing this morning.

Baffling.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 11:54, closed)

At least your monkey
has good taste in music.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 16:08, closed)

The Mokey's got me a few times..
..bastard once photocopied someone-else's bank statements, put my underwear in the breadbin, left a bottle of wine in the bathroom sink, half-ate two tins of sardines with crackers and left the lights on with Stevie Wonder's "Illuminations" on repeat.
(raymond "three griddle pans" luxury yacht lovin' the christmas action, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 16:27, closed)

At the pub where I spend most of my time
If I go out with 50quid, drank 7 pints i'd still have 43 quid left :)
(Freddles, Sun 8 Feb 2009, 17:05, closed)

Yes I found this last Friday
Went out in a pair of black shoes.

On the walk home through the snow suddenly realised that not only had £50 disappeared from my wallet but I was wearing flipflops.

Today I got my shoes back from a local pub.

I have no idea what happened.
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 1:20, closed)