Morningstar Boulevard
One day Lucifer decides that the pavements in his area are a bit the worse for wear, after all sinners have been trampling upon them for millennia now. So he decides to have them re-surfaced and puts the job out to tender. Considering his reputation as the Lord of Lies and a bit of a trickster it is no surprise that there are few bids. Less than few. One in fact. So Old Nick phones up Goodings and Sons to get the quote cleared up. The conversation goes as follows:

“Hello, is that Goodings and Sons?”
“Yes it is.”
“Ah, good show. This is Lucifer here, you put a bid in for a re-surfacing job but you didn’t detail the job breakdown in labour and materials.”
“Ok, let me just check…….Ah yes. The big one. Right, the labour cost come out at roughly £2.65billion and the materials at £25,000.”
“That sounds fine, but why are the materials so cheap?”
“Well, we just did some work for the Moscow State Circus and due to new road-laying technology we’ll be able to re-cycle the Big Top canvases. Keeps cost down you see.”
“That’s brilliant,” says Scratch, “Jobs yours.”

And that, dear friends is why

The Roads to Hell are paved with Goodings Tent Sheets.

Ay thang yew.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 5 Mar 2009, 13:40, Reply)