Unbelieveable!
While out on a night out in Doncaster with the boys a good friend assured me that he could do a perfect impression of a former head of MI5.

Of course we disbelieved him but as the beer flowed his assertion became more adamant - Who were we to prove this valiant impressionist wrong? So we agreed, slightly tongue in cheek at first but the beer flowed some more and we started to place a few quid on this chameleonic charade.

Our friend, who now had us rapt with attention now there was a bit of folding riding upon the act said he'd meet us in the centre of town next to the monument of Arthur Scargill in 15 minutes.

For those of you not native to Yorkshire, a large statue resides in Donny town centre of yon Arthur. A plaque proclaims "Arthur Scargill led the National Union of Mineworkers (NUM) from 1981 to 2000. This statue took 1000 Kg of bronze to cast and stands as a testament to his stoic and stalwart leadership".

So, as asked, we met with our chum who was already present with a four pack of premium lager and a grin on his face. As he saw us he sprung into action and with one hand cracked open a can of lager, pouring it all over himself while furiously licking the cast bronze arse of Arthur Scargill! We stood aghast as he repeated this until the beer was gone and not a millimetre of Scargill's bronze arse lay untongued.

"There you go!" proclaimed our man in triumphant tones "Stella Rimmington!".
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Thu 5 Mar 2009, 22:54, Reply)