Christmas tidings.
Every christmas my little primary school would do a play and sing carols to the adoring/bored parents on their wee wooden seats. A few years in and our head decided this was ENOUGH. We had to have EXTRA assemblies until we could SING IT RIGHT. This being the head teacher who famously stood up at an easter event and told us all, including the parents, that our singing was abysmal and we should be ashamed.

So there we gathered to practice our song over and over and over until she stopped being mental. It took us a wee bit but we got it in the end. Sort of...

"We wi- you a merry chri-ma-! We wi- you a merry chri-ma-! We wi- you a merry chri-ma-! And a happy new yeeeear."

Satisfied, the night drew near. We were full of christmas joy and good spirits, and the energy that comes from showing off to a room full of adults. We could do this, damn it!! We drew breath...

"Whee whish you a mherry chrisssssmasssss! Whee whish you a mherry chrisssssmasssss! Whee whish you a mherry chrisssssmasssss! AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

We hissed and bellowed triumphantly to our applauding parents and our fuming head.

I saw her yeeeears later, long after I'd left and she'd retired. She's just this lovely little old lady now! How does that work??
( vix0r was not Matthew on, Sun 16 Jun 2013, 15:03, 3 replies)

Careful now, with a story like this you might get an aspie fit thrown your way.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 16 Jun 2013, 19:26, closed)

And did Santa bring you your two front teeth?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 17 Jun 2013, 8:56, closed)

No
The girl from the St Winifreds School Choir got everyones share of front teeth that year
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Mon 17 Jun 2013, 11:43, closed)