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This is a question My sex misconceptions

Freddy Woo writes, "aged eight, a boy from my class told me everything these was to know about sex: male prostitutes are called destitutes and women use tampons to stop men sticking their willies up them. Also, women pee out their bums, something I didn't realise was wrong until I was about 18 and my first girlfriend looked at me aghast."

Share everything - Uncle B3ta wants to know.

zero points for conception/misconception jokes

(, Thu 25 Sep 2008, 15:54)
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Fanny Batter – explained…

One afternoon when I was a kid, I was watching TV and became a bit confused at what I saw.

I went and found my dad who was busy in the greenhouse outside.

I casually tapped him on the shoulder and enquired: ‘Dad…what’s love juice?’

My dad spat his pipe into the begonias, and then realised that the time was right to do ‘the talk’

He poured himself a scotch, sat me down, then explained candidly and openly about sex, masturbation, pregnancy, STDs, anal intercourse and homosexuality.

Moments later, after I had picked my jaw up off the ground in wide-eyed astonishment, my dad enquired:

“By the way son, what were you watching on TV?”

I then replied: “Wimbledon...but I didn't see any 'arse-fucking' on that!”
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 15:53, 10 replies)
just had to wipe the monitor as it was covered in coffe spit.
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 16:07, closed)
you fucking crack me up
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 16:18, closed)
A HA HA *click* HA HA HA *clickety*
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA *click*
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 16:47, closed)

(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 16:51, closed)
That is brilliant
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 18:22, closed)
For bizarre image of Hunter S. Thompson launching his cigarette holder through the begonias that appeared in my mind and now won't leave.
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 18:59, closed)
Far be it from me to doubt your veracity ...
it does rather conjure up a nice image...

A little like your sister going to your Mother and asking, "what does 'vice' mean"? There follows a discussion of prostitution (what's a prostitute?), homosexuality (what's that, Mummy?) drugs, and other flamboyant behaviour.

"Why do you ask?" enquires Mother. "Oh, I've been made vice-captain of the netball team".


Or the other tennis-related joke, to which the punchline is "forehand, backhand, forehand, backhand, forehand, backhand, deuce".
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 19:27, closed)
(, Mon 29 Sep 2008, 21:25, closed)
now everyone in the office thinks I'm very unstable, still giggling
(, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 8:53, closed)
I didn't see that punchline coming. I think we have a winner!
(, Wed 1 Oct 2008, 10:54, closed)

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