Shit Stories: Part Number Two
As a regular service to our readers, we've been re-opening old questions.
Once again, we want to hear your stories of shit, poo and number twos. Go on - be filthier than last time.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2008, 14:57)
As a regular service to our readers, we've been re-opening old questions.
Once again, we want to hear your stories of shit, poo and number twos. Go on - be filthier than last time.
( , Thu 27 Mar 2008, 14:57)
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Reading on the bog
I'm sure most people have a stack of reading material by the Khazi (or is it just me?) - appropriately, most of what I read whilst on the shitter is shit.
Right now, I have the following rivetting reads gracing my crapperside table:
"Want To Play" by PJ Tracy - A low-rent cop thriller.
"A Question of Blood" by Ian Rankin - Another low-rent cop thriller.
Motorcycle News - Read it once, now use it for emergency arsewipe.
"A Beginner's Guide to C++" - Don't ask me why, and
"The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins, just because I don't like it.
There's normally a copy of The Sun floating around there too, I like to smear shit on the latest reactionary tabloid headlines.
Oh, and Auto/Bike Trader, so I can lust after vehicles I'll never be able to afford.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:01, 13 replies)
I'm sure most people have a stack of reading material by the Khazi (or is it just me?) - appropriately, most of what I read whilst on the shitter is shit.
Right now, I have the following rivetting reads gracing my crapperside table:
"Want To Play" by PJ Tracy - A low-rent cop thriller.
"A Question of Blood" by Ian Rankin - Another low-rent cop thriller.
Motorcycle News - Read it once, now use it for emergency arsewipe.
"A Beginner's Guide to C++" - Don't ask me why, and
"The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins, just because I don't like it.
There's normally a copy of The Sun floating around there too, I like to smear shit on the latest reactionary tabloid headlines.
Oh, and Auto/Bike Trader, so I can lust after vehicles I'll never be able to afford.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:01, 13 replies)
Oddly Enough
I came acroos a perfect book for toilet read:
Uncle John's books.
Filled with interestign yet useless facts, stories and other stuff
Which is what i read, and also, Men's health.
Although I did go through a phase of reading the manuals to particularly complex computer games or ones with a lot of backstory (TMI?)
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:18, closed)
I came acroos a perfect book for toilet read:
Uncle John's books.
Filled with interestign yet useless facts, stories and other stuff
Which is what i read, and also, Men's health.
Although I did go through a phase of reading the manuals to particularly complex computer games or ones with a lot of backstory (TMI?)
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:18, closed)
.... to smear shit on the latest reactionary tabloid headlines
Yes - we believe you.
That's why we all take The Sun to the kharzi. Not to crack one off, oh no.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:23, closed)
Yes - we believe you.
That's why we all take The Sun to the kharzi. Not to crack one off, oh no.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:23, closed)
Wow!
I have "the God delusion" in my crapper too. Coincidence? maybe.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:26, closed)
I have "the God delusion" in my crapper too. Coincidence? maybe.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:26, closed)
I've just moved into a flat with two male friends of mine
When I arrived, the loo had the Onion annual, the hardback version of Melancholy Death of Oysterboy, and a book on cloud shapes. Good reading material, I think.
Since moving in, I got the flu, and bought Illness Magazines (Empire, SFX, Grazia).
Grazia is now in the loo.
I did not put it there.
And I don't think it's the gay housemate who put it there.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:30, closed)
When I arrived, the loo had the Onion annual, the hardback version of Melancholy Death of Oysterboy, and a book on cloud shapes. Good reading material, I think.
Since moving in, I got the flu, and bought Illness Magazines (Empire, SFX, Grazia).
Grazia is now in the loo.
I did not put it there.
And I don't think it's the gay housemate who put it there.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:30, closed)
I see a trend here.
I've visited two bathrooms recently where The God Delusion has been stacked on the cistern. Poor Dawkins. Maybe it's a meme.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:31, closed)
I've visited two bathrooms recently where The God Delusion has been stacked on the cistern. Poor Dawkins. Maybe it's a meme.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:31, closed)
our reading list
Calvin & Hobbes
The Broons annual
whatever magazines my mum's brought in that week (usually Chat or Best)
Real highbrow stuff, you'll agree .. or not.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:32, closed)
Calvin & Hobbes
The Broons annual
whatever magazines my mum's brought in that week (usually Chat or Best)
Real highbrow stuff, you'll agree .. or not.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 14:32, closed)
A bed and breakfast in Moffat Scotland
Had the right idea. In each of the toilets was a fully stocked bookshelf filled with a variety of fiction and educational books so you could fill your mind as you emptied your bowels
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 16:25, closed)
Had the right idea. In each of the toilets was a fully stocked bookshelf filled with a variety of fiction and educational books so you could fill your mind as you emptied your bowels
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 16:25, closed)
Tis the most peaceful place to read
We currently have "The Little Book of Calm" and "No Bliss Like This" in the crapper.
A few years ago, Argos had a marvellous gadget in their catalogue - it was a wall-mountable magazine rack / bogroll holder, all in one! I covetted that item! Alas, I was skint at the time. Come pay-day the bastards had discontinued the best ever product. Bah!
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 16:48, closed)
We currently have "The Little Book of Calm" and "No Bliss Like This" in the crapper.
A few years ago, Argos had a marvellous gadget in their catalogue - it was a wall-mountable magazine rack / bogroll holder, all in one! I covetted that item! Alas, I was skint at the time. Come pay-day the bastards had discontinued the best ever product. Bah!
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 16:48, closed)
@Tourettes
I, too, have the Little Book of Calm in my shitter! Forgot about it as it seems to be hiding down the back of the cistern at present.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 17:01, closed)
I, too, have the Little Book of Calm in my shitter! Forgot about it as it seems to be hiding down the back of the cistern at present.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 17:01, closed)
Can I recommend
www.amazon.co.uk/Ten-Dates-Niro-Richard-Kelly/dp/0571237665
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 17:54, closed)
www.amazon.co.uk/Ten-Dates-Niro-Richard-Kelly/dp/0571237665
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 17:54, closed)
I have a copy of
Flushed With Pride : The Story of Thomas Crapper
by Wallace Reyburn.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 19:42, closed)
Flushed With Pride : The Story of Thomas Crapper
by Wallace Reyburn.
( , Tue 1 Apr 2008, 19:42, closed)
Tut! Do it Properly!
In my throne-side magazine rack (yes, really, the boss decided a pile of back issues of Shooting Times, Private Eye and AutoTrader made the place look untidy) we have as of this morning...
a few Larson/Riley cartoon books for the quick download with minimal strainage, Guys & Dolls by Damon Runyon for the more serious otter-freeing session, and for Longer-Term 'Hgnnnnnnnn....plip' Ordeals I'm hacking through Tai Chi for Dummies as I search for inner tranquility while one's crimper whimpers for mercy.
( , Wed 2 Apr 2008, 11:25, closed)
In my throne-side magazine rack (yes, really, the boss decided a pile of back issues of Shooting Times, Private Eye and AutoTrader made the place look untidy) we have as of this morning...
a few Larson/Riley cartoon books for the quick download with minimal strainage, Guys & Dolls by Damon Runyon for the more serious otter-freeing session, and for Longer-Term 'Hgnnnnnnnn....plip' Ordeals I'm hacking through Tai Chi for Dummies as I search for inner tranquility while one's crimper whimpers for mercy.
( , Wed 2 Apr 2008, 11:25, closed)
my bathroom is known to one and all
as the reading room. i'm far too easily distracted by noise, so the toilet is the one place i can read in peace.
at the moment my reading material is
48 by james herbert
moving pictures
thud!
making money
lords and ladies
the last 4 are all by terry pratchett
( , Wed 2 Apr 2008, 18:39, closed)
as the reading room. i'm far too easily distracted by noise, so the toilet is the one place i can read in peace.
at the moment my reading material is
48 by james herbert
moving pictures
thud!
making money
lords and ladies
the last 4 are all by terry pratchett
( , Wed 2 Apr 2008, 18:39, closed)
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