As I said....
Giving up smoking was a piece of piss for me, unfortunatly my desire to give blow jobs increased alarmingly as the number of fags I inhaled decreased.

Those plastic nicotine inhalers weren't around 15 years ago.


Sorry!
( girlinthehole, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 14:50, 19 replies)

Mum!

I'm surprised at you...

Actually, I'm not.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 15:08, closed)

^^
Sorry son, but it's how I got to meet your father.
( girlinthehole, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 15:13, closed)

It's not Captain Placid is It???
...


NOOOOOOO!

*reaches for mind bleach*

Incidentally - I like your sig...I have a craving for German Wine, Chinese Food and Northern Lasses...

You don't happen to know any, do you?
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 15:16, closed)

Only me!
But I'm in lust at the moment and cannot be swayed.
( girlinthehole, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 15:21, closed)

(Vader breath)
Poof! I am your father!

(/Vader breath)

Ahem... now, about that lack of cigarettes...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 16:04, closed)

No...That's not true....That's impossible...

TRL: "Search Your feelings, you know it to be true..."

(Vader Breath)

Me "Nooooooooooo, Nooooo...Hang on...

Before I jump off this ledge thing...If you were my father you'd know it would be a simple 'Poo' for short...not 'Poof' thanks very much.

(not that there's anything wrong with that of course)

That's the second time today somebody has mistaken my name for Poof-Lake...hmmm"

*Considers changing name*
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 16:44, closed)

Flakin' Stevens
B3ta's own Justin Poof-lake.

Or is it like the EU wine lake, but with, y'know....poofs?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 17:01, closed)

Ah but back then.............
I was a mere Trooper Placid. I was young, I needed the money (sobs) You don't know what it was like (boo hoo etc etc)
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 17:07, closed)

Mmmmmm EU Wine Lake....


Do you have the address?

and a pair of boltcutters?

and a very large glass?
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 17:07, closed)

Well...
if I had said "Poo, I am your father!" people might have thought I was cursing that fact in first-grade fashion. Besides, to make that work you need a consonant at the end of the name- I mean, how would it have been if Darth Vader had growled, "Loo, I am your father!" It would have lost all impact as people started laughing!

Although I must admit, the thought of Vader breath punctuating "Poo!" does make me grin...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 17:08, closed)

@Pooflake
actually I always thought your name was Po O'Flake.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 17:21, closed)

I have to admit it now but...
Flakeypoo my love.


Your father was.......








Jabba-the-hut


(I like em big and wobbly)
( girlinthehole, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 18:24, closed)

Now it all makes sense...

I was wondering where I got my slimy good looks, wonky eyes, pointy tongue, love of eating lizard creatures and metric ton of green body fat! (Now we've met I know I didn't get it from your side of the family...)

Mind you, now Pricess Leia has strangled him....his whole empire should now be MINE!!

and with compound interest considering it happend 'A long time ago' it should be worth a fucking mint!

Woo yay! - Way to go mom!

Now can anybody give me a lift to a galaxy far, far away? I'll make it worth their while

EDIT: and actually, that long tongue and 'flicking action' has come in handy on many an occasion....cheers dad!
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 18:35, closed)

Don't forget your towel sweetie.....
I forgot about your dad's tongue.


*Smiles and mentally drifts away*

Btw, your digestive problems probably come from his side of the family also.
( girlinthehole, Wed 26 Mar 2008, 18:52, closed)

I feel like I'm missing out on something here...
Another B3ta bash, anyone? Just so I can feel like part of the gang..?

Pretty please?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 22:46, closed)

^^
I second that request as I had to cancel my attenance at the recent london meet.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 27 Mar 2008, 9:20, closed)

@DG & AL...

Your wish is our command...

www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/11856

BGB, Captain Placid and a fair few others will be there - should be a bit of a laugh.

But it's not all good...unfortunately...I'll be there too.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 27 Mar 2008, 9:23, closed)

^^
Much as I'd love to, we're still hacking away at Christmas debt. However, the sweary one has just found herself a new job, so maybe next time...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 27 Mar 2008, 9:58, closed)

Gah.
It's no fair- I'm an entire ocean away! I wanna be there too!

*grumble*

Okay, at some point I'm coming back over there, and you lot had damn well better have a bash while I'm there!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 27 Mar 2008, 11:39, closed)