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This is a question Surprise!

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver asks: Ever given granny a heart attack on her 90th birthday or knocked down the wall between the living room and kitchen by mistake before the wife gets home? Tell us tales of surprises and their fluffy and/or messy endings.

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 12:10)
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Unconscious surprise
I have a mate (honest) who, despite being in his 40s, loves to scare the bejesus out of people by jumping out of hiding places when they least expect it. His name's Lee.

On one occasion, the rest of the family (wife and two kids) were out, and he heard the car pulling into the drive. Giggling to himself, he decided to hide in a storage cupboard opposite the entrance to the lounge and to see just how badly he could make them shit themselves.

They came in, put the shopping away, wandered round the house etc, while Lee stayed concealed, waiting for the perfect moment once they had all settled down. This they eventually did, after about 20 minutes or so, and they settled down on the sofa to watch a bit of telly.

Lee's plan was to leap out of the cupboard, taking a giant stride or two, leaping into the middle of the lounge while roaring at the top of his voice. Not imaginative, but likely to be effective. Unfortunately, in the 'giant stride' phase of the plan, Lee neglected to factor in his 6 foot 4 inch height. As he embarked upon his leap into the lounge, he smashed his head on the underside of the door frame, knocking himself unconscious before he even had the chance to roar.

Thus his family were confronted with the sight of their husband/father hurtling noiselessly into the middle of the lounge, collapsing as he went, and smashing through the coffee table.

Went well.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 13:07, 9 replies)
Gets a click from me.
After dicking about about with a tape measure my housemate had just finished using I surmised that I was about 6'4. Then I attempted to walk out the kitchen into the back garden, braining myself against the door frame in the process. My housemate pointed out, helpfully that the frame is 'only 6'2'.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 13:27, closed)
Splendid mental picture.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 14:08, closed)
This! ^ :D

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 20:00, closed)
I don't know anyone called Lee
who isn't a complete knob.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 14:49, closed)
Lee Nelson?
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 15:17, closed)
Lee Mack.

Lee Hurst.
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 17:28, closed)
Lee Majors
Am I doing this right?
(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 17:36, closed)
Damn you!
I never thought about the bionic man.

He had dodgy flares, but that's not really enough.
(, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:50, closed)
Like it.

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 18:43, closed)

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