I do keep hearing/reading people saying
that whoever did the asking-out-to-dinner should be the one that pays.

I think a lot of women like the guy to *offer* to pay, even if he then agrees to split. Not bothered myself, I always insist on splitting it, being a feminazi type (we have our plus points, guys). Plus I don't want them thinking I owe them something.
(Binary Solo loves a bit of algebra, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 13:15, 2 replies)

I totally agree
On the last bit. Some men seem to think that paying for your meal entitles them to other action. I'd rather pay any day.
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 13:29, closed)

I'd also agree with that
Which is why when I pay the full amount, I always make it clear that it's just my thing, I'm not expecting anything in return.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 13:33, closed)

I offer to pay
because I'm nice like that. But I make it clear that this doesn't mean she's getting any from me.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 14:25, closed)

I pay
and then lace the meal with rohympnol...

Everyone's a winner!
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 16:39, closed)

That's another convenient get out
It looks a sensible idea on first view, but the main problems are :

Alternating payment on meals etc only really makes sense for someone you already know.

In straight dating the proportion of women who will not ask a man out, ever, is non trivial. Of the women who will ask a man out, there are also a (mad) minority, who will then claim the man did the asking and should pay when he actually didn't..

End result : men end up out of pocket more than women. I think sometimes this is accidental, and know sometimes it is a deliberate sense of entitlement by the woman.

Having said all the above, though, the vast majority of my dates have been with independent women who tend to split the bill as standard. Any subsequent failure has not been, as far as I can see, due to who paid.
(EssY, Wed 29 Oct 2008, 14:33, closed)