Want some time away from the Wife/Girlfriend?
Now this only works if your Girlfriend/wife actually likes you!

If I have a new game for the PS3 or fancy going ou with the lads, start an argument. The thing I like best is to have a day off work and sit around and do nothing, dont even get dressed until she gets home, she goes mad and ignores you. You can draw this out for as long as you want.

My wife will ignore me until I say sorry and 10 mins later we're back to normal. During this "ignore" time spend it as you wish, hang out with the lads and come home at all hours, if she moans that you're late just tell her that you were being ignored and needed to see you friends to cheer you up, following this up with the apology from the previous incident.

Works every time!

Hope the wife doesnt read this.

My wife is also the type of person who does my chores to prove a point that I'm lazy. I had an argument the other day came back from work to find the back garden had been mowed, bonus!! She said she did it because I was too lazy, 10 mins after I said sorry she was making me dinner and all was forgiven
(rambosilk Liberty for wolves is death to the lambs., Wed 27 May 2009, 16:03, 5 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You sneaky fucker!
LOL gonna try that one ;-)
the beauty is that it is psychologically reasonable behaviour given the perfectly plausible explanation.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Wed 27 May 2009, 20:50, Reply)

Be warned!
Taking them for granted like this may appear to be working, but women are devious fuckers.

All will be fine up until the day she caves your head in with a shovel and you become and integral part of the patio area.

You won't see it coming.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Thu 28 May 2009, 10:35, Reply)

Thats exactly what happened to me!
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Thu 28 May 2009, 10:45, Reply)

My other half
Must not like me at all, that would have fuck all chance of working in our house.
(Kip, Fri 29 May 2009, 10:18, Reply)

noices
I guy I know makes annoying noices until he reaches a point where his wife cannot stand him, he is then told to get out of the house. Which he does, he tends to be able to justify coming home from the pub half cut easier if he was told to go out.
(wobbler, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 12:51, Reply)