Do you have a high-powered job in the middle of London?
You're more important than other people, then, so be sure to barge them out the way screaming "I HAVE TO GET THIS TRAIN!"

Act nochalant - if slightly annoyed - when the doors close before you get on the train, and people start openly laughing at you.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 14:16, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

On the tube
Running like a mad fool is essential, as there are next to no trains running, and there won't be one along in a few minutes

you cunt.
( Cadmus has teh uplikn coeds at, Mon 27 Sep 2010, 20:01, Reply)

The couple you see don't need to travel together!
Feel free to push between them and seperate them so that the one left behind has to guess which station in the chain their partner will wait for them at -- they love it! It's not like they paid twice what you did, or there is another train that you could get.
Also, I'm told it is good manners, on encountering a family, to trap the teenage daughter in the train door as the, obviolsly stupid, girl tries to join her parents.

If I lived in London I'd have been arrested for killing a commuter by now.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 18:02, Reply)