Top Tramps
Beard length: 16cm

What you got?
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Sun 5 Jul 2009, 23:36, 9 replies)

Damn
Beard length: 12cm

But...

Length of rope holding trousers up: 38cm
Length of shit-stain from crotch down right trouser-leg: 28cm
Age of mangey dog companion: 11 years
Length of most recent turd left in alleyway (uncoiled): 17cm
ABV strength of lager: 9%
( Chum Gnomesky Nom Chompsky, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 6:48, closed)

38 cm?
That's one skinny-ass tramp.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 11:28, closed)

Percentage of teeth remaining - 23%
Number of plastic bags - 13

Shoes - 1
(Is this a good idea? ... Yes this is definitely a good idea, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 9:27, closed)

Ha!
Colour of skin: Black (Caucasian)
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 10:29, closed)

Gibberish factor: 8
buggrit! millennium hand and shrimp!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 10:39, closed)

Gibberish factor 9
Ill give em the wrong end of a ragmans trumpet I will
(Obi wanker nobi Its not a bug, its an unexpected feature, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 16:21, closed)

Cans of Special Brew - 6
But unfortunately:

comprehensibility - 5%
( chenobble rocking his explorer beard on, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 11:49, closed)

I beat you all!
Supertramp!

Oh, hang on...whoever's got Supertramp is the ultimate loser.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 16:27, closed)

you were right

you were right the first time, supertramp trumps all tramps.. no backsies, switchies or toppsies unless 'all a baa' is declared, which only works in cork and under very specific conditions...
(The Cats Twat, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, closed)