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This is a question Unemployed

I was Mordred writes, "I've been out of work for a while now... however, every cloud must have a silver lining. Tell us your stories of the upside to unemployment."

You can tell us about the unexpected downsides too if you want.

(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 10:02)
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boredom breeds creation
i have, in the decade that has passed since i was 16, spent a mere 2 months unemployed.
during this time, i was bored SHITLESS. this manifested itself in a plethora of unusual outlets.

the more mundane. wanking. i don't just mean normal wanking, i mean the frenzied kind of wanking that could put a bus full of 14yr old boys and a zoo chimp to shame. the real sort of face-reddening, gurning, one arm bigger than the other like some sort of fleshy fiddler crab, one foot on the ceiling, extreme wanking. this was replaced by a girlfriend, but there was the time she was at work still to occupy.
so i started on the garden (see my wasp story on a previous QOTW) once the garden was better manicured than a glamour model's clunge, the attention turned to the bike. that thing got the wheels rebuilt, the bearing stripped, the works. STILL i had free time and nothign to do with it.

then it began
the bong-building.
it started small. a courvoisier bottle bong. then a weird pipe contraption made of assorted jars and metal parts. then the giant bamboo bong.
then the 4' long piece of drainpipe with the copper radiator tube downpipe... WITH a midway twist for ice. debilitating!
then things got REALLY out of hand
i am proud, AND ashamed to say that shortly before becoming employed again, i managed, with a little help from my housemate, the following contraption.

1 canister diving air belonging to the landlord, half-full. long hose attached to a home-made assemblage with two screw-on ends and a midesction of copper pipe, which can be heated with a paintstripper gun.
another shorter hose going into the bottom of a sealed demijohn half full of water. another hose leading out from above the waterline to ANOTHER demijohn full of ice cubes, leading to a smaller hose. leading to a balloon. it was a three person operation, one to gently tweak the valve on the canister, another to heat the copper tube full of green, and another to fill the balloons.
it lasted for one party, half-filled the kitchen, got a LOT of people VERY fucked up, then became unstable and prone to firing smoking hot ganja all over the place.

but for a while, it reigned supreme.

i really need gainful employment as my tinkering gets WAAAAY out of hand.
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:00, 6 replies)
or it didn't happen...

*clicks anyway*
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:14, closed)
Excessive wanking?
Surely that is just a normal amount? I am employed and I have a girlfriend, but it doesn't sound too much to me.......
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:21, closed)
I've just thought of an idea for a business...

(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:27, closed)
"extreme wanking"
Is that like Extreme Ironing? Where you crack one off on the top of a mountain or something?
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:34, closed)
it's whipping it out, shouting "MUM", trying to get off and put it away before she turns up in your bedroom.
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 12:59, closed)

there is definitely the makings of a cottage industry here.
(, Fri 3 Apr 2009, 20:31, closed)

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