My Wanking DisastersEver been caught by your mum? Or tried to fuck a pillow and got the spongey bits stuck to your bell-end creating a strange new flower? What about the time you man-milked the keyboard causing your PC to short-circuit and knocking out the mains for the whole street? Maybe you're a lady and you were using your mobile phone as a vibrator and accidentally dialed your mother? Tell us your stories and we'll tell the world.
(
rob, Tue 1 Jun 2004, 17:23)
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Caught out by mobile phoneHaving gone into the office for the morning, I had to go home and get my car before driving out to see a client out of town in the afternoon. Stopping indoors to get my car keys, I realised that I had a splendid opportunity for a quick Sherman.
Having selected an appropriately hardcore DVD from the collection, I managed to knock one out and achieve my objective with some vigour.
It was at this point that I thought I could hear a distant voice calling my name. The feeling of dread flooded over me as realised what was going on. I removed my mobile phone from my suit pocket and discovered that in my frenzy of fapping I had inadvertently managed to call the number of an old female Uni mate, who I hadn't seen or spoken to for some time.
Not quite knowing what to do, I hung up on her without speaking. When she phoned me back I was still bright red with embarrasment and let the call divert. I later listened to her message, which went something along the lines of:
"Hi, long time no speak. Had a strange call from you, with lots of funny noises?!? Not too sure what's going on there?!?"
I've seen her since, but it was ages afterwards and, thankfully, nothing was said.
I have never failed to lock my keypad since.
BTW - What happened to the Your Greatest Dilemmas question of the week? Can we have a report please?
(, Wed 2 Jun 2004, 16:32, Reply)
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