My boy is 20 tomorrow
and before I die I would love to see him crying, sobbing, on the sofa in front of me begging for help.
Tired beyond belief, unable to speak, eyes rolling round in sockets that have bags the size of suitcases under them.
Wondering to himself how he got in this mess.
Unsure if his life will ever be the same again.
Thinking he has made a terrible terrible mistake.
Then I can scoop up the bundle of screaming red faced crying grandchild into my arms and make it all better. Pour all my heart into something my dearest love in the world has produced, and spoil them all to death.
I fucking can't wait to be a grandma.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 22:39, 8 replies)

Make sure you tell him this.
There is nothing we early-20s males love more than hearing our mothers tell us they expect grandchildren.
( Pretender, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 23:08, closed)

I don't expect it!!
I suggested it about a year ago and he pissed himself laughing.
Then about a month ago him and his mates were sat around talking about how when they have kids they can't wait to get them into computer games and music. It was quite sweet.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 23:36, closed)

My mam knows only too well that if I ever fathered a child, I'd lose all patience and the hurl the fucking thing through a plate-glass window before it was a month old.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 23:40, closed)

My mum nearly did that
to my second brother. It was only as a neighbour came round to take him off her that she really didn't throw him through the window!
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 23:44, closed)

It was my dad who did this for me when mine were babies. I miss my dad.
(Freakmandu, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 7:19, closed)

Oh I am sorry to hear that.
:-(
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 19:52, closed)

Wow...
If you posted this an hour and a half later you could have been my mother!
(baldpig pee'd in your pool on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:56, closed)

Maybe I am.

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 19:53, closed)