Good afternoon
Some posh numpties were trying to have a shooting party in the fields this morning.

I was out jogging - the hard frost makes a change from the mud. The fog was so thick you couldn't see more than 10 or 20 yards.
These shooters picked a field in a triangle between 3 public paths. You couldn't see one path from the other, or the middle of field. They stood around drinking and waving their guns about.
I think they gave up, because I still haven't heard any shots.

So - how did you *nearly die* this morning?
( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 13:55, archived)

the word 'nearly' is doing a lot of heavy lifting there

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 14:48, archived)

I nearly had to beat them all off!

( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 14:50, archived)

I think it might be more connected to the jogging.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 11 Jan 2025, 16:06, archived)

Proton decay.

( brb welcome to my reed organ repair blog, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 16:10, archived)

Now that really would be unlucky.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 11 Jan 2025, 16:33, archived)

Stealth kitten

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 18:05, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8434531
( Cheers Cheers, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 18:10, archived)

Plz don’t “jog”
It’s confusing for inocent bystanders to see your knock-need attempt at exercise

Have you considered running? Or just walk
(SILOUSER40, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 18:27, archived)

I have to agree with this weirdo.

( brb welcome to my reed organ repair blog, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 19:31, archived)

I used to run, but what I'm doing now should not be mistaken for actual running
- hence I call it jogging.

I can't manage more than 10 km a time any more.
( Invisible Wizard - 11th Level MERPer, Sun 12 Jan 2025, 9:01, archived)

My knees have been fucked for 25 years so jogging is right out.
I've always believed that jogging does a number on your joints and heart.
( brb welcome to my reed organ repair blog, Sun 12 Jan 2025, 15:42, archived)

Alcohol and firearms, that classic winning combination.

( .Yeti., Sat 11 Jan 2025, 19:07, archived)

Family all grumpy with me now because I won at scrabble.
Might go out to the greenhouse and do a The Shining. Will serve them right to find my frozen corpse all covered in icicles.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 19:48, archived)

I didn’t nearly die this morning
but I can work on dying of alcohol poisoning this evening if you like. I’ve done the first four pints already.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 19:50, archived)

lol drugs

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Sat 11 Jan 2025, 19:51, archived)