Fuck, it's early
I have a shit train journey and a pointless conference to look forward to.

What have you got to look forward to, what with the glorious Easter weekend coming up and all?

alt: Are *all* the "new" posters just sockpuppets, and we are still in fact all Al or Bert?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 16 Apr 2014, 6:39, 39 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Good round ere innit?
Disposable income, I've landed a bit I forgot that I had coming truth be told I have no idea what to spend it on, suggest away you bunch of wrong uns.

Alt: So it's Easter coming up celebrating the resurrection of Christ, what modern day miracles do you think the bearded wonder would do if he was kicking about in this day and age?

Alt:alt: ALRIGHT?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 15 Apr 2014, 21:26, 18 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Nobody else doing a thread today?
No?
Poor Richard McBeef's fingers are bare!

What does this lazy Tuesday evening hold in store for you?
I have Thai curry and drag queens
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 15 Apr 2014, 19:05, 15 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

I've got strawberries. What have you got?

alt. Im also stressing about this wedding in 2 months.
I can't book into a hotel to get ready cos they're getting hitched on a Friday at 2. I can't get the Thurs off either. Bah!
Are you one of lifes worriers or do you just go with the flow?

altalt. lunch?

Ah who cares.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 15 Apr 2014, 12:21, 153 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

alright
My day has been non stop 'win'.

How's yours been?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 17:50, 68 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Ukraine
I anyone else hoping for some awesome beatdowns of those dirty Ruskies?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 15:56, 74 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Sweary Mayory
www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/swindon-mayor-says-sorry-for-calling-disabled-people-mongols--but-charities-dismiss-forced-apology-9258603.html
Do places like Swindon need a mayor, let alone one who hates spastics?
What other traditions do we need to let go of?

Alt. Yo Momma

Altalt. Why is Battered such an angry little man?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 14:48, 52 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

It's fucking lovely in Laaandan today, sunshine makes everything better
Tell me a two line joke

Alt: best Tony

Altalt: I hate it when people say "tuth" instead of "tooth", what common mispronunciations annoy you?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 13:04, 134 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Good morning shitcunts.
Did you have a good weekend?

Alt: make up your own.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 9:19, 99 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Alright?
Alt: Hugz 4 u bbz
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 14 Apr 2014, 8:31, 19 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Sunday evening thread
So, what are you guys and gals doing tonight? Do you go to bed early so you're fresh, bright eyed and bushy tailed for Monday? Or, do you get ratarsed and schlepp in reeking of drink and second-hand fag smoke?
Alt: Football, gay or crap?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Sun 13 Apr 2014, 19:46, 7 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

I can only assume they are giving away free bags of rice on The Mall today.
Why else would a load of Ethiopians be running across London.

Sunny Sunday!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 13 Apr 2014, 10:37, 22 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Who's imagining Tangle's cunt?
I imagine it's a bit ......yeasty
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 17:27, 67 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

oh lol
look at his face. it was so him! yeah, this is the THIRD TIME they've made this terrible mistake...

metro.co.uk/2014/04/11/virgin-media-ann-and-ron-hayward-refuse-to-pay-bill-in-tv-porn-row-4695892/
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 15:26, 87 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Cyclists
People who ride bikes are known as cyclists, because bike is an abbreviation for bicycle.

So why are people who ride tricycles not also called cyclists, but are instead referred to as toddlers?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 14:30, 60 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

I'm laminating.
What are you doing?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 13:13, 61 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

set yourself on fire you paedophile cunt

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 11:27, 167 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

alright
get fucked
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 11:09, 14 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

'gid moaning'
Alright webnerds, it's Friday innit so what are your lunch/weekend/shopping plans?

Alt- 'alroght'.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Apr 2014, 8:01, 167 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Yo yo yo!!!!!
Does anyone still celebrate Chicken Thursday?

I missed "Coincidence Day" on March 12th, did anyone else miss it?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 10 Apr 2014, 21:02, 6 replies, latest was 10 years ago)