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# This I would support
but I'm not sure they would give you the job, is what I'm saying.

But by all means hoax up some miracles, see if they say shit.
(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:37, archived)
# I'm a few steps ahead of you there.
I've been hospitalized for being suicidal recently, so not only do I have proof of being sufficiently nutty to lead the team, I have been virtually reincarnated already.

Plus I'm an ordained reverend, anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:40, archived)
# don't do it.
i'm destined to stab the pope.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:49, archived)
# Fuck it.
I'll pardon you. You won't even go to hell, and you can still collect $200 if you pass 'Go'.

(Though I may have to take the knife from you and tap you on the forehead with the handle a few times first to let you know how disasterous this decision could have been.)
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:52, archived)
# i don't want to be pardoned, i want to kill the pope.
that's how i want to die: shot to death by the vatican guard while i stab the pope through the heart with a sharpened crucifix.

it's my destiny, man.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:55, archived)
# Well get on with it, then.
I'll wait 'till you finish off the current one, then I'll step in and resurrect you while making balloon animals or something to the delight of the peons.
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:01, archived)
# i don't want to kill this one.
he's too obviously evil, it'll look like an inside job.

the balloon animals are a nice touch, though.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:04, archived)
# You could kill Al Gore?
He invented Catholicism.
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:07, archived)
# i can kill anyone.
i have a toxic personality.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:09, archived)
# Really? And your whites practically sparkle!
However do you keep them so clean?
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:11, archived)
# i wash them in the tears of disappointed children.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:15, archived)
# They'll get used to their prayers not getting answered
once I'm in power. I'm going to get to work on my new rubber stamp:

 RETURN TO
V A T I C A N
   SENDER
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:19, archived)
# 'return to vatican' would be a great rubber stamp to have.
you'd confuse everyone at work and few letter carriers would refuse to deliver them even without stamps.
(I helped save b3ta! postbear has metal knees, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 4:24, archived)
# Why not be traditional?
Walk in with a bunch of lads, lop off his head, and take the lot.
It's how it worked in the old days.
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:40, archived)
# I was going to try this, actually
but my lads kept drowning when we were trying to charge and storm their beaches from across the Atlantic.
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Mon 1 Oct 2007, 3:44, archived)