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# i think i may have worked out why you're single....
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 2:55, archived)
# I know why I am single
becuase I'm not a "confident" person which really means I'm not an arrogant gutter swab that's prepared to slither over to and ingratiate myself with women.

Some people take me at face value but then I'm "just a friend". Which means they will never root me, they will go out with utter pricks, they will laugh at me when I a say I'm lonely. BUT when the cry to me about how they got dumped and how much of a play-around tosser he was, and I give the same disinterested response as they give me they come the raw prawn.

Shit, I'm a tad bitter this morning.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:06, archived)
# I suggest eating chocolate.
Or going and getting some manly exercise by lifting up a sofa and lowering it a few times.
(I helped save b3ta! Rev. Cleo still alive, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:08, archived)
# id rather curl up in the feotal position and cry
/emos
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:10, archived)
# I'm an arrogant
filthy, slimy, confident, arrogant, good-looking, arrogant bastard and I have been known to smother the odd lady with my charm ( back when I was allowed ). But I have a big cock so it all turned out nice in the end. ;)

Seriously, I'm a lot older than you. Don't mistake confidence for arrogance and trust me, one of the most attractive things that ladies find in a man is confidence.

edit:// although you are an antipodean. If you can't get an Aussie bird to shag you then you must be hideous. I've never met an Aussie bird who did not want to fuck within at least 5 hours.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:10, archived)
# ^every part of this except the lot older than you
edit: and the edit
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:12, archived)
# I'm bawling my eyes out at the edit.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:16, archived)
# It's not your fault.
They have all moved to London and usually are looking for a bed for the night because it's the night off from their bar job and they know they have not got a hope in hell of getting back into their digs at 5am.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:18, archived)
# wow that does sound classy
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:20, archived)
# if you are ever in London
and it's 3am and you don't have a dancing partner to go home with, just get a cab to the nearest Walkabout and take your pick.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:24, archived)
# but i'd have to go to a walkabout... people might see me there....
my prey used to be the fish out of water girls at rock gigs.
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:26, archived)
# i don't know what come the raw prawn means
but if you want a piece of genuine honest advice, with absolutely no bullshit whatsoever, listen: its not worth trying to find someone that will just let you fuck them if neither of you care about each other. if you're being yourself with these girls and they don't want you, in the long run its a good thing. everyone meets someone that they make a connection with sooner or later and its usually absolute fluke when it happens. its not worth upsetting yourself over. life's too short.
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:10, archived)
# yeah i know ive sortof been in the first situation
raw prawn (yay strine!) is to sort of pretend ignorance usually hypocritically such as to play the victim in a situation. cf carry on like a pork chop
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:15, archived)
# give me a for example i don't really get it
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:16, archived)
# ok, ummm
KEBAB: BEDLAM YOU ARSEHOLE!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING STEALING MY GROG?!?!?!?

TO'B: I SAY!! Such accusations are almost not worthy of my highbrow response! However, lest my reputaion be sullied, I must vigorously protest against these wild accusations!!

KEBAB: AH FUCK OFF AY!!! DON'T COME THE BLOODY RAW PRAWN!!! YOU'RE HOLDING A BLOODY TINNY OF FOSTERS FOR CHRIST SAKE, SO DON'T PISS ON MY HEAD AND TRY AND TELL ME IT'S RAINING!!!
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:31, archived)
# you have such a wonderfully colourful language
tell me, do you actually say "point percy at the porcelin" 'down under'?
(I helped save b3ta! Tom OBedlam I have control of a tank, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:33, archived)
# yeah, same as splash the boots, water horses etc.
I think (if you've seen the famous bit out of Barry MacKenzie) they used two phrases out of context, namely "strain the spuds" and "shake hands with the wife's best friend" used to mean piss when I'd interpret them as wank
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:42, archived)
# I love that last one.
"Don't piss on my head and tell me it's raining."
(I helped save b3ta! Rev. Cleo still alive, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:36, archived)
# get with the best slang phrases around:
www.aussieslang.com/slang/australian-slang-a.asp

Knock yourself out.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Sun 13 Jul 2008, 3:44, archived)