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Masturbate into my shoes!

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[MOD EDIT] banned...

(ater806, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:01, archived)

i love you

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:03, archived)

That makes me sadder

than the spam...

Nice that you found a fail image that doesn't even need toap, though, so cheers.

(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:09, archived)

Kiss here for cheap confectionery.

MOD EDIT: It would be nice if you didn't respond to spammers by posting goatse pics on the board. The spambot has long gone, but it's the rest of us who have to look at it.

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:07, archived)

That makes me much much sadder

than the fact that the wobbly girl pic is now too small...

Two wrongs don't make a right you know.

(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:10, archived)

Would you like me to linky it? I will if anyone asks.

People always seem to get upset when I post this, even though the meaty bit is just a model's pouty mouth and not, in fact, the inside of a lunatic's rectum.

If you look at the actual picture, there is nothing explicitly there. You're just implying it yourself.

It's people's own sordid, experienced minds that make them scream when they see this.

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:19, archived)

Wow, my first mod edit! I'm honoured.

And he even beat me to it when I was offering to self-censor.

Despite there being nothing remotely pornographic in the image, apart from nudges to the imagination of the viewer.

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:22, archived)

Hmmm

Simulated nastiness I can take, but I have to know that it's simulated for the effect to work. I'm not going to spend enough time looking at a goatse image to figure out that it's faked, and even then there is the question of why...

(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:23, archived)

That's bullshit!

(Fly Projector, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:23, archived)

No, it isn't.

All you saw was a pair of familiar, glistening hands making a gripping motion (totally innocuous in themselves) grafted on to a couple of other entirely innocuous images.

The pic itself is entirely implicit, and not at all explicit.

I wouldn't've posted it if I thought it was, cos I don't want to cause anyone trouble at work.

I am sorry if it's caused any bother, but... ffs!

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:30, archived)

To be honest I couldn't give a rat's arse about the picture and I'm not working at the moment

but this idea of "hey I put something innocent in the picture so it's ok" really doesn't work - if I was in an office and someone ten feet away saw what looked like a picture of goatse on my screen, the HR manager really wouldn't be interested in my "no, it's actually a model's lips made to look like a stretched anus" argument.

NSFW means that if someone walked past your desk they would assume you're looking at porn/nastyness.

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:45, archived)

I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:46, archived)

I GET TO DO WHAT I WANT BUT ALSO I DON'T GET PAID

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:50, archived)

YOU COULD INVEST IN A WEBCAM MAYBE

I AM SURE YOU HAVE GOT WAHT IT TAKES TO BECOME A SUCCESSFUL INTERNET BUISNESS

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:33, archived)

I HAVE ONE BUILT INTO MY LAPTOP

I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER USED IT

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:35, archived)

No, no YOU haven't.

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:37, archived)

It flips around and I keep it aiming away from me

so that view of a stack of cds must be a bit of a disappointment.

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:45, archived)

CAN I BORROW YOUR MARIAH CAREY CDS PLEASE GRONKPAN

I PROMISE I WILL CLEAN THEM BEFORE I GIVE THEM BACK

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 5:25, archived)

The only people who would see that pic and associate it with a stretched arsehole

are people who've already seen goatse.
So the damage was already done.

I must've posted that pic 3 or 4 times on the dayshift in the last 3 years or so, to a 'mixed' response - but never censorship.

Are we gonna have our b3tapics pulled because we're IMPLYING stuff?

What's happening?

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:53, archived)

Don't get hissy, that doesn't help anyone.

Let's just say that if I set that picture as my desktop on my work pc, I'd get called into some kind of HR meeting to discuss appropriate behaviour in the workplace.

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:09, archived)

hahaha!

*Imagines the scenario*

Since you put it like that, I feel doubly honoured.

And I take your point.

Here, have some real filth.

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:15, archived)

Phwoar...

dirty minx

(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:23, archived)

well, I stared at it for a REALLY long time

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:28, archived)

That's the spirit!

(You sick fucker)

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:45, archived)

I might have to make more of these. Unless you can sell me a pair of these exactly as illustrated. If not... FUCK YOU AND THE COW THAT EXCRETED YOU.

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:08, archived)

My mind may be being prompted by the discussion up the board a bit

but it looks like Kermit is about to goatse his mouth there.

(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:42, archived)

The correct technique is crucial.

If you want to avoid MOD-B&ING, LOL.

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:47, archived)

WE SHOULD HAVE A GOATSE LOOK-ALIKE COMPO

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:50, archived)

LOL!

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:54, archived)

Oh. Haha. I just noticed the ring. So it *is* intentional.

(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:53, archived)

needs more glistening on the hands

;)

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Sea Tramp the thinking woman's 8 Ace, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:22, archived)

don't mess with me mate, you know the sort of stuff i really want

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Lightguy hail satan, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:09, archived)

I'D LIKE SOME VAGINASHOES PLEASE.

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:10, archived)

I know where you can get

a couple of gloves...

(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:11, archived)

ASSGLOVES?

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:14, archived)

These would be fist gloves

not ass.

(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:17, archived)

Well, I'll take a set of each.

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:20, archived)

I THINK SOMEONE SENT ME A LINK TO SOMETHING LIKE THAT ONCE

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:48, archived)

HERE YOU GO, TARTARSAUCE

NSFW NSFW NSFW

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:49, archived)

Rapitinui's Dad has sex with feet.

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MrPineapple .co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE., Fri 1 May 2009, 3:57, archived)

Still not getting any?

lol

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:19, archived)

OOOOH YOU BITCH

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:32, archived)

They're not shoes. I CAN'T WEAR THESE.

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:58, archived)

i've got your misplaced holes right here, bub!

SORRY!!! (fuck fuck fuck, i can't HREF very well)
NSFW!!!

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:28, archived)

ahhhhahhhhahah

nice write-up.
Is that first product shot a tubgirl reference?
THAT'S PRETTY TWISTED, GRONKPAN

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:31, archived)

BIM BIM BIM

BIM BIM BIM BIM BIM BIM BIM BIM

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:33, archived)

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 3:41, archived)

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:15, archived)

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD.

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:20, archived)

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:22, archived)

that's the saddest critter I have ever seen

i bet it's delicious

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:24, archived)

Yeah it's a handly slab-shaped meatstick thing

in a world of carnivores with carving knives.
Its only defence is to turn green when afraid, trying to camouflage itself as rancid luncheon meat

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:27, archived)

oh :/

I thought it was delicious lime cake

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:30, archived)

Haha

you're absolutely right of course :)

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:31, archived)

If Salad Fingers was a rectangle.

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Ttssattsr, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:30, archived)

Haha!

I've just laughed hard enough to hurt myself. I really don't know why this cracks me up. But he does appear to have some kind of respiratory problem.

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cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:31, archived)

This is the last one I made. They're numbered sequentially, so you can use the URL of the one I posted and just subtract 1 from the filename each time to see them all.
Edit: yeah that's clear as fucking mud. What I mean is, rargle5.gif, rargle4.gif, etc.

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:35, archived)

awwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I'd only seen number five out of those.

I think number two is the cutest

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Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:42, archived)

Ah, I remember those!

You've got an amazing mind. Keenly aware.

I'm afraid I'll be needing another one. I've used this one up doing stuff like this-

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cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:43, archived)

He just got caught taking a dump in someone's shoe and is about to receive a stern talking to.

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:43, archived)

pulsating protein orbs do bad things

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PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:23, archived)

Hahaha

that's a bit disturbing :)

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:24, archived)

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:36, archived)

AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:34, archived)

Yeah, that's about what I thought, or possibly

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 May 2009, 4:36, archived)

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..wil, Fri 1 May 2009, 6:38, archived)

I like how this moron keeps holding on to the rail.

And wont let go of his case until he's half overturned.
Such a totally braindead twunt! A fitting reply.

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Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Fri 1 May 2009, 7:56, archived)

Thats something that gets learn very young.

You'd really have to be aware or used to falling Up stairs to want to let go. I'm sure his brain didn't have the first clue what was going on.

All it knew to do was to hold on to something and hope for the best.

It's a funny clip.

(waxdart hello., Fri 1 May 2009, 9:33, archived)