hahaha, the first time I used that, (the eat like a rabbit one) there were lots of 'pfffffts' around the roompromptly followed by lots of men going 'owww' as their wives kicked them in the shins under the table
(
The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:06,
archived)
Oooooh, what is that one?
Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:11,
archived)
I'll leave it to Archie to tell - it's his gag.
barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:15,
archived)
waits with baited breaththough no doubt i will have forgoton it by the time it comes for me to write a BM speach
(
Jorvic,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:17,
archived)
Yeah, well Archie appears to have forsaken us Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:17,
archived)
no he hasn't ;) (below) The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:19,
archived)
OK so with all due deference to him and his telling of the tale...It involves husband and wife the following morning, languishing in the marital bed and contemplating breakfast in bed.
Hubby orders double sausage, bacon, egg, tomatoes, mushrooms, black pud (if that's your thing) and a fried slice.
And for madame?
Just a few salad leaves and a couple of raw carrots please.
Sir, we do supply a range of vegetarian and vegan breakfast options
No it's not that - I just want to see if she eats like a rabbit as well.
*pause for giggles and kickings under the table*
Fiver says that by the time I've actually written this out, Archie's posted it already.
(Hubby orders double sausage, bacon, egg, tomatoes, mushrooms, black pud (if that's your thing) and a fried slice.
And for madame?
Just a few salad leaves and a couple of raw carrots please.
Sir, we do supply a range of vegetarian and vegan breakfast options
No it's not that - I just want to see if she eats like a rabbit as well.
*pause for giggles and kickings under the table*
Fiver says that by the time I've actually written this out, Archie's posted it already.
barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:22,
archived)
*hands fiver* The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:22,
archived)
Yeah, you're righthe told it better :P
Cheers sir
(Cheers sir
Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:24,
archived)
Ok, I'll try and tell it as I told it in the speeches...Ladies and gentlemen. before I leave you I'd just like to get you to think about the happy couple tomorrow morning after todays wonderful event. Picture if you will the newlyweds waking up in the honeymon bed, as Mr. and Mrs. XXX for the first time. XXXXX (The Groom) will wake up, and ring down to room service to order breakfast for the pair of them.
For him, he'll order Bacon, Eggs, Fried Bread, Sausages, Tomatoes, Hash Browns, Beans, Mushrooms and Black Pudding, all washed down with a mighty cup of Tea. He'll then turn to his new Wife, and for her he'll order a single carrot.
When questioned by the hotel staff on the other end of the phone why just a carrot he'll reply.
'After last night, I want to see if she eats like a Rabbit as well'
/Word of caution. never make eye contact with the Bride's parents while telling this story, or just after either
(For him, he'll order Bacon, Eggs, Fried Bread, Sausages, Tomatoes, Hash Browns, Beans, Mushrooms and Black Pudding, all washed down with a mighty cup of Tea. He'll then turn to his new Wife, and for her he'll order a single carrot.
When questioned by the hotel staff on the other end of the phone why just a carrot he'll reply.
'After last night, I want to see if she eats like a Rabbit as well'
/Word of caution. never make eye contact with the Bride's parents while telling this story, or just after either
The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:19,
archived)
Hahahahaha!God, I've seriously misjudged what you can get away with in best man speeches if that's a typical joke, but in my circle of friends it would be hilarious
( Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:22,
archived)
Badum-tsch :DRelly though.. How well was it recieved the times you've used it? I can't work out if it falls the wrong side of risque?
(
The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:24,
archived)
The first time I used it was in a reception of 160+ people in a very 'upmarket/expensive/snooty' reception.I only knew 4 people in the entire place - the Groom (obviously), the bride, and the groom's parents. To say I was bricking the whole thing would be an understatement. The bride's father had spent nigh on high £25,000 on the whole do, so I could have - in one fatal gag - ruined the entire day.
Thankfully, it went swimmingly, and afterwards many people came up to me, bought me a drink and said that gag had lightened the whole day for them, and it was the best laugh they'd had in ages, which was great to hear :)
Even the bride's father at the end of the night came up and congratulated me, but I'll agree, it was a 'balls of steel' moment to decide to go with it.
(Thankfully, it went swimmingly, and afterwards many people came up to me, bought me a drink and said that gag had lightened the whole day for them, and it was the best laugh they'd had in ages, which was great to hear :)
Even the bride's father at the end of the night came up and congratulated me, but I'll agree, it was a 'balls of steel' moment to decide to go with it.
The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:28,
archived)
Ball of steel indeed!Weddings are weird things, all the emotions are amplified, but there is a strange sense of "anything goes" at times as well.
But I think trying to secong guess the potential mood / reaction of a wedding reception is nigh on impossible.
(But I think trying to secong guess the potential mood / reaction of a wedding reception is nigh on impossible.
The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:32,
archived)
that's very much the case with the mood/reaction :) best just to go what you feel comfortable withthe wedding in question above was absurd.
Chimney Sweeps for luck, releasing Doves, Cadillac for the Groom and Best man (with 50's throwback driver) 2 rolls royce's for the bride and bridesmaids. It wasn't comfortable at all, far too formal and rigid for me.
And to think they all laughed at a gag about shagging like rabbits.
(Chimney Sweeps for luck, releasing Doves, Cadillac for the Groom and Best man (with 50's throwback driver) 2 rolls royce's for the bride and bridesmaids. It wasn't comfortable at all, far too formal and rigid for me.
And to think they all laughed at a gag about shagging like rabbits.
The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on,
Wed 12 Aug 2009, 13:36,
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