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This is a link post Home Deeeeeefense 101
This guy has a good handle on it, only problem might be him keeling over with cardiac-arrest at the first dog bark.
(Spin Its a thing., Sat 14 Jul 2012, 10:18, Reply)
This is a normal post You could easily distract him with cake
then rob his guns
 (I helped save b3ta! Fadgebadger Sweaty sumo wanks for everyone!, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 10:21, Reply)
This is a normal post "I am deeply afraid of a complete unknown, and wish to demonstrate my ineffectiveness should it ever come knocking at my door"
Also: Needs more bulletproofing.
 (I helped save b3ta! Captain Howdy, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 10:41, Reply)
This is a normal post The only thing he needs now
is a bomb to detonate if all fails..
 (Sherbs, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 10:41, Reply)
This is a normal post He must live in a really shitty place to need all that rubbish.

(pissflaps. FSPW, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 12:01, Reply)
This is a normal post I'd love to give some chav 20quid to nick his dvd player.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Sat 14 Jul 2012, 12:16, Reply)
This is a normal post I'm
going to make a youtube video explaining my home defense, so that every one knows what I have got so that they can work out how to get around it.
By blimp attack?
 (I helped save b3ta! The invisible ham Fig rolls are the best, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 12:25, Reply)
This is a normal post So he's going to shoot through the floor at an unknown assailant?
Has he thought through about the consequences of that? He doesn't know who he's shooting at, it could be the Police or a concerned neighbour. I'm sure there must be some law about calling a warning and seeing the assailant before loosing off bullets. Maybe not, this is America I suppose.
 (I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 12:32, Reply)
This is a normal post Stick the Captions on...
Cos he really knows his hats, and other amusing things.
 (Roger Moore's Right Eyebrow saw your mum on chatroulette on, Sat 14 Jul 2012, 15:44, Reply)