Pissy
This QOTW is giving me a horn - some of the sex stories are good also.


So I’m working with my old man for the summer. We’re in that glorious part of the world – Grimsby and staying in digs above a pub in Cleethorpes, which guarantees that we’re pissed every night.

We’re sleeping in the same room, me by the window with the sink at the end of my bed, him in the middle of the room.

I wake up in the morning with slightly wet feet – I ask the old fella, who is up and walking around, if it’s raining outside.

“no” comes the reply

“has it rained” I ask

“no, its bright as fuck”

“have you spilt tea or something on my bed – my feet are wet” I ask

“no – and the top of the duvet is dry”

“what’s going on then”

“oh” says he – as the cogs go round “yeah I pissed on your feet in the night”

“fucking brilliant – thanks, why is the top of the duvet dry then” I enquire

“I lifted up the duvet, pissed and then put it back”

Caring, lovely, old father didn’t want his only son’s feet to get cold in the night!

He was a bugger for it though – he pissed in his wife’s handbag, which was in the wardrobe, one night, she didn’t realise until the next day as she handed over a soggy piss soaked fiver in exchange for half a pound of sausages at the butchers.
(Clit Ninja is having a white space party!, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 13:26, 11 replies)

TMLB;DR

( M o D, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 13:31, closed)

TWAT;DR

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 13:34, closed)

????

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:12, closed)

???

(Clit Ninja is having a white space party!, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:09, closed)

Too many line breaks; didn't read.
A variant on the classic tl;dr or "too long; didn't read".

It's always bothered me that it goes to the trouble of using a semi-colon but then abbreviates an abbreviation.

tl;dnr
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:25, closed)

thanks
edit - i think
(Clit Ninja is having a white space party!, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:50, closed)

I thought it was tumbledryer.
You know - for the fiver.
( Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 15:40, closed)

"a soggy piss soaked fiver in exchange for half a pound of sausages"
A perfect summary of your mother's sex life.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 13:34, closed)

shit yeah!

(Clit Ninja is having a white space party!, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:23, closed)

everything is wrong with this story.
everything.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 14:26, closed)

I would have thought that rather than working for the poor old chap,
you should have taken over the family business, and put him in a home.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 16:35, closed)