we don't really have any, we're all far too dull and get on too well
but I will say that my friend got a bit drunk at my brother's wedding and danced a bit too close to my 60 year old uncle. she came over to find me at the bar, looking a bit distraught.

poor sod has been known to me and my brothers as "uncle boner" ever since.

(she was 33, before anyone yells NONCE.)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:24, 18 replies)

NONCE

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:26, closed)

NUNS

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:28, closed)

When you are a 60 year old man
you can't afford to be shy about your boners.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:41, closed)

*tries to remember*

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:51, closed)

There was a court case here in Brighton some years ago
An elderly gentleman was accused of getting his todger out on the top deck of a bus. The judge asked him to explain why he would do this, given that he was previously a law-abiding pillar of society.

He explained that it was the first erection he'd had in 20 years, and didn't want to waste it.

"Fair enough," ruled the judge, and dismissed the case.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:52, closed)

Brighton urban legend land
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 16:55, closed)

This is not in any way, shape or form true.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 17:16, closed)

Well I for one believe every word of this.
And I look forward to seeing the news story about it.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 18:57, closed)

It wasn't a bus, it was his car.
And the judge was a policeman.

And the old man's ten year old cousin was with him.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 19:09, closed)

I found this story about a sickening nonce
www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/paedophile-gets-reduced-jail-term-369691
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 19:42, closed)

^not being stalky or creepy

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 19:47, closed)

He luuuuuurves you.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 20:13, closed)

^ upset

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 20 Feb 2014, 20:15, closed)

You're one to talk.
www.newworlds.co.uk/author.php?author_id=10

"The presence of small children always makes me uneasy..."
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 21 Feb 2014, 0:45, closed)

Well yeah, most film premières I attend are evening affairs with free booze
that was a hungover Saturday morning in Leicester Square surrounded by broadsheet film critics and their screaming toddlers. Still, I got paid.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 21 Feb 2014, 8:33, closed)

The word is premiere, you tool.
If it were French it would be premier ... première is feminine.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 21 Feb 2014, 8:55, closed)

^defensive about getting a colin on around kids^

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 21 Feb 2014, 9:01, closed)

I don't understand what a "colin on" means

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 21 Feb 2014, 11:35, closed)