Left footers
Everything about catholicism is common. The ridiculous soft focus paintings of the sacred heart. Pastel statues of Mary - who they treat in almost exactly the same way as "Hello!" treats Posh Spice.

The tacky vulgarity of the churches. And the names, dear lord, the names. Bernadette, for crying out loud
(ubergeekian, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 13:34, 12 replies)

You Are Ian Paisley
AICMFP
(mofitzy, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 13:35, closed)

Not at all
Protestants of his sort are just as common. But then, that's the story of Norn Iron, isn't it? Two basically indistinguishable bunches of scratters exploding and shooting the shit out of each other while the educated classes shrug and get quietly on with life.
(ubergeekian, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 16:17, closed)

Hmmmm.
Due to the traditional lack of contraception there are quite a lot of us so ergo we are very common.

Fair enough.

But if you are having a go at the works of Caravaggio or the beauty of the Cistine Chapel then I am afraid I am going to have to ask you to step outside you Hun bastard.

Bishop Len Brennan.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 13:51, closed)

Not to mention the Infant of Prague
Horrible little bugger, the sort of kid whose head you would force down the bog at school.

Even my Mum, who thought the Pope was one down from God, used to refer to the crap devotional pictures in the Universe (the Left Footers' weekly tabloid) as "Bogtrottery".

BTW, Michaelangelo might have got the Sistine Chapel right, but all his female sculptures look like men with tits.
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 14:07, closed)

He has a point...
...in that if you ever go to a Mexican market (or Lourdes/Knock etc) the shite on sale would be too kitschy for even John Waters.

(Whilst in Rome I bought a Pope ashtray for a friend of mine - he is a big 'Gers fan and it has pride of place in his kitchen.)
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 15:28, closed)

I'll see your pope ashtray
and raise you Our Lady in a seashell grotto of Lourdes table lamp.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 17:07, closed)

Yer on
Your Our Lady in a seashell grotto of Lourdes table lamp, and I will raise you a plug in Sacred Heart picture with red backlit heart.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 17:10, closed)

pft!
They're ten a penny. But I hate the way Jesus' beseeching eyes look at you when you're eating your dinner, like a big hungry labrador.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 23:39, closed)

Don't throw him a rasher.
He's a jew.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Sat 18 Oct 2008, 9:44, closed)

the head fell off my Child of Prague
when I accidentally knocked him off the windowsill, where he was making sure the weather was good. Since then I've had incredibly good fortune with money. Were I in any way superstitious I'd knock the heads off religious icons on a very frequent basis.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 17:05, closed)

Hahahaha!
Funny you say that, my Mum has had headless statue of St Anthony for 40 odd years. It was a big joke in our family because she lost it before she could glue it back on.

*For you non Papes out there, St Anthony is the patron saint of lost things.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 17:15, closed)

hey !


we always call 'ye lot' left footers too ! by the holy mother of jaysis etc...

j
(The Cats Twat, Fri 17 Oct 2008, 18:56, closed)