Tube Nightmare
First of all, I can guarantee you that this is the God's (or Dawkins' if you're that way inclined) truth.

I was enduring a particularly long tube journey, when it came to my attention that there were a significant proportion of women standing up. Now, I would usually be terribly British about such a situation and merely tut under my breath. However, for some unknown reason I decided I was going to combat this situation. So I picked my target, a young bloke in his 20's who could have quite easily stood up, like myself and offered his seat to one of the ladyfolk.

Filled with chivalrous indignation, I approached him and uttered the painfully polite:

"Excuse me sir, I strongly suggest that you offer your seat to one of the many women who are standing"

While this may have yielded a rather positive attitude from the rest of the carriage, the standing female contingent in particular, the seated chap who I'd confronted seemed less than pleased. He didn't say a word, he just stared at me. Sensing it wise not to press matters further, I decided to call a halt to my chivalrous campaigning for the day.

Any self importance gained from the general approving looks from my fellow travelers was soon replaced with anxiety when I noticed the silent seated individual was muttering under his breath whilst glaring at me with a most venomous look. The onlookers seemed interested enough to want to watch a potential fight erupt, but of course not to the extent that they would intervene in said fight.

When he started to reach down to his bag, eyes locked firmly on me, I really started to get worried. The entire carriage was transfixed, waiting to see what this scorned individual was about to produce. At this point I was so convinced he was about to brandish a knife I would have been prepared to get off at the next station and just run like fuck, but sadly the opportunity did not present itself. It was a packed tube, with very little room for maneuver, so I just braced myself for the assault that was surely to follow.

So when he reached down to his shoe rather than his bag, I was rather confused. And when he then started to reach for something on his leg, I was equally perplexed. Had I perhaps slighted a Scotsman, who was about to accost me with his dirk? With the eyes of the entire carriage on him, he started to roll up his trouser leg, and only then did it become all too apparent...

He had a prosthetic leg.


Yup, I asked a one legged man to offer his seat up. I basically forced this guy to reveal his handicap to an entire carriage of people. I think its fair to say that any allies I had won with my self important attempt at chivalry were lost rather rapidly. The subsequent 30 seconds seemed to be the longest of my life, I could only stammer an apology and wait in excruciating cringe ridden silence until my stop.

Just writing this has me curled up in excruciating embarrassment. I can only assume that I will never top this as an embarrassing moment.
(wordsworthless is outnumbered but never outpunned, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 11:40, 9 replies)

ahhhh.
Poor little women. Completely incapable of standing, or indeed of looking after themselves at all.

Thank goodness for meddlesome meretricious blockheads like you.
(Star Wars Starwarsy McStarwars Face, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 11:56, closed)

But
They are such dear, sweet creatures.

And they do so love little kittens.

Outdated chivalrists - Know Your Limits!
( 100% Cock Raw like carrots., Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:05, closed)

That'll teach you...
If you had said that to me, i'd have told you to fuck right off.

Firstly, the silly "women deserve the seat more than men" is utter bull. If a lady requires a seat, she shall ask and therefore receive, we don't need your self-important intervention thank you.

Secondly, HA.
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:00, closed)

Why?
Obviously pregnant women - fine!
Disabled women - fine!
Women 0ver 60 - fine!

But why women as capable as oneself? They have the vote now - did you know that? Alarming but true!

If they choose to wear uncomfortable and ridiculous footwear then that is their problem.
( 100% Cock Raw like carrots., Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:07, closed)

^^^ this
They complain they want equal rights? Right! You got it.

You can have all the 'rights' men get, but you also lose the ones we don't have.
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:13, closed)

While
I appreciate your sentiment, if you had stood up to let me sit down I would have taken it as a sign that I looked pregnant.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:13, closed)

Heheh
*claps*
( Axai is in Montréal, Canada O.o, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:14, closed)

well, on the bright side, you enabled him to experience one of the few situations where he gets to feel lucky for having actual amputation rather than one of the many illnesses/injuries/disabilities that affect people's ability to stand on a moving train but aren't obviously visible to the layman.

I mean, if he'd had MS or arthritis or something, and assuming that he didn't carry a doctor's letter around with him to show to self-important (sorry, 'chivalrous') strangers... the whole carriage would have spent the whole journey glaring at him for being so ungallant and there would have been fuck-all he could do about it.

As a crip and as a woman I promise you that if I need to sit down, I will arrange matters for myself as discreetly as possible.
( Batsgirl, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:28, closed)

Don't feel so bad.......
....firstly, the hoppy little fucker walked onto the tube I assume? Well he can stand up then, can't he? Technically, he'd be better standing up, what with only one leg to get tired.

Secondly, to all the women having a go because the OP was doing something polite and chivalrous - fuck you. You'd be at the front of the queue complaining about 'bloody men' if he hadn't - anything with tits is generally far too eager to pull either the equality / weaker sex card whenever it suits.

If you want equality that much, remember that next time you get lippy and I punch your fucking lights out.


[/end semi joking but somewhat still kinda mean it rant]
(NoveltyCondomHead Clanks Wams., Thu 4 Dec 2008, 13:22, closed)