Her name is Becky and she's amazing
She was the love of my life and I lost her because of my stupidity and selfishness.
What was I thinking by smoking that shit?
I'm still so sad and I wish I could meet her for the first time again tomorrow.
( Twizla ...a shrew living on the edge of a bog, extinct on, Wed 29 Sep 2010, 23:56, 16 replies)

It's the detail that makes this story so interesting.
This FTW.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Thu 30 Sep 2010, 6:15, closed)

Are you 13?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 8:31, closed)

C'mon people
Between the lines this is loaded with meaning and subtext. Do the work, put in the effort, empathise.

You people these days just want everything overdescriptively and hyperbollockolly handed to you on a silver spoon.
Gah, you just don't know you're born
(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 8:37, closed)

Hyperbollocks.
Spooge at Warp 9!
( Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Thu 30 Sep 2010, 8:50, closed)

I'm intrigued by the smoking reference
I had a kipper habit that got out of control once
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 8:53, closed)

Smoking shit is bad mmmkay

( Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 9:00, closed)

I think this is a great story
It's almost on a par with Jacob Dyer's holiday experiences
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 9:31, closed)

Ouch, neck, etc

( Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 11:23, closed)

Yeah hahaha

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 9:11, closed)

it's good shit though
i think it's labrador.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 9:53, closed)

To the comment leavers-
Don't you belong on the talk board you vicious basteds?!
(impossibly witty twat No, YOUR Mum etc etc, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 10:12, closed)

They've got a point
It's like those awful facebook posts which consist of a vaguely descriptive bad feeling/mood/event which just begs people to chime in:

PersonIMetOnceAtAParty: Oh shit, that's gone and done it now. I'm so sad.

FriendofPersonIMetOnceAtAParty: Awww, hun! What's the matter? Tell me on this public forum, [so your angst can be shared like a cheap prostitute at a stag do in Amsterdam.]

It's QOTW and we like messy details upfront without having to pander to an internet random's sense of drama...
(ElectricSexPants would like to be the Sultan of something, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 10:23, closed)

Um, no, I'm exclusively a QOTWer
And I like stories to be interesting, true (if slightly exaggerated) and well written.

This has absolutely none of the attributes that a good story needs.

This is QOTW, a place to tell stories, amuse and move people. Not write a short, tedious piece of crap that says nothing.

/talk can be rude and they are unpleasant to regular, funny posters. Everyone dislikes rubbish though.

Oh, and we're bastards, not basteds. Well, I've never been basted (I'm not a turkey, you see), but if any others have, what was it like?
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Thu 30 Sep 2010, 10:30, closed)

Fair point
But don't knock being basted, it can be a very pleasant experience, providing you can tolerate gas mark 7 for 2-3 hours. I might just go and try and write that amusing story now.

I agree entirely with the Facebook comment. My sister (40 years old, LOLtastic) is always bemoaning mundane details of life on Facebook and it is highly irritating when these inane "Me so sad" type comments are met with "Oh, cheer up, we miss you" bullshit from her friends and vague acquaintances.
(impossibly witty twat No, YOUR Mum etc etc, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 10:54, closed)

Wash your mouth out

( Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Thu 30 Sep 2010, 11:24, closed)

Go on.. have another..
(wankymcwankwank Eels, tobacconists, hovercraft and bouncy bouncy., Thu 30 Sep 2010, 11:32, closed)