PJM's Dad reminds me of a similar tale
I'm referring to his post earlier today, regarding a polystyrene aeroplane.
His father and mine have some similar traits - except mine has always taken much longer to galvanise any plans into action. Mine's with his on the distinct absence of patience / abundance of foul temper.

PJM's story reminds me of a time 30+ years ago, when my parents bought me a kite. Not the run-of-the-mill diamond shaped one with a pretty pattern that I wanted. Oh no, those flimsy plastic shitty kites are for mouth-breathers. (Intellectual snobs are my folks.) No, no, no, Young Tourettes shall have a properly constructed kite, made from canvas and dowelling rods. So they built the fucker in the living room; I wasn't allowed to help because it involved Proper Grown-up Glue and I was bound to "do myself a mischief".
What was that squeezy glue in a plastic bottle from the 70's called? It had a red rubber end (woop snik gnuff) with a slit for the sticky substance- HALT!! This is turning into Frankie Vaughan!

Anyhow, that was the only glue I was allowed to use (Gene Hunt had a bottle of it in Ashes to Ashes a couple of weeks ago.)

A couple of hours, and many expletives later, "my" lovely blue kite was finished and placed very high up, out of my reach. (??!)
Eager to try it out, we all went to the beach the next day in the Vauxhall Viva.
Except, when we got there it was very very windy. Well, Gale Force 2.18 maybe. I wasn't allowed to fly "my" kite. The wind would be too strong for my little girlie handies. My folks wrestled, endeavouring to *GET IT UP*.
"Now can I have a go please?"
"No - you'll get blown away!"
"Can I at least touch the very end of the string?"
"NO!"
"But it's my-"
"Just get in the car before you- SHIT A BASTARD FUCKING BRICK!!!"

The wind had changed direction.

"SHIT-FUCK SHIT- FUCK SNOT-HELL-BUGGER-SHITE!!"

The pair of them were performing a rather special impression of Charlie Brown. The only missing prop was The Kite-eating Tree.

Yep, twas cattled, mere minutes later. I never even got to lay a finger on the fucker after they'd broken it!

"Hands OFF! You'll get a splinter!"

They promised they'd get me a new one.

I'm still waiting.

And, as for the psychological scars! Don't get me started on those....
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 19:34, 14 replies)

Hehehe
Was it "Gloy"?

What is it with parents and kites? I had a super-swish stunt kite, and my Dad took me out to some local hills to fly it. He told me to stand by the car and promptly wandered off, all the while swirling and looping the kite, until both he and the kite were gone from view. For what seemed like hours but was probably about 15 minutes.

Alone on a moor while my dad stole my kite, no wonder I'm all wrong.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 19:43, closed)

Shitshitshitshitshit
I can see that bloody glue in my head but can't summon up the name.
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 19:45, closed)

Gloy Gum
Just thinking of that name has brought back the smell of the stuff.

It was all we used in school, well that or flour and water paste.
( speedyballbangpots, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 21:00, closed)

Parents can be reet bastards, can't they?
*Makes note to be nice to my own kids, should I have any*
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 7 Apr 2008, 21:01, closed)

yes
it was gloy gum, you can still get it but it doesn't come in the triangular bottle anymore.
(cmouse is pondering about life in other jobs, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 21:22, closed)

Um, it so does come in that bottle
I have some sitting on my desk as we speak.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 21:29, closed)

*click*
For the Peanuts reference!
and the amusing tale of course...
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 22:23, closed)

So that is where you learned all of your colorful language :)

( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Tue 8 Apr 2008, 1:21, closed)

Frankie
Howerd? Or did Frankie V have a smutty side too?
( seeballs Doo da da doo da da doo da da doo, da da doo da do, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 7:35, closed)

Clicks
Have a sympathetic click from me. I've seen my Dad take many a promising toy from me and bugger it right up!
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 8 Apr 2008, 9:38, closed)

Seeballs
Frankie Vaughan = porn. Although in this instance Frankie Howerd would probably suffice as well...

Incidentally Tourette's dad is a retired electrician, who is currently rewiring their house. So far it's taken about 20 years to install a couple of new light switches...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 8 Apr 2008, 9:42, closed)

So it was Gloy...
Thanks all!
That was driving me (even further) round the bend!

This one might have been a stunt kite, actually. It certainly wasn't the traditional shape - 3D cuboid thingy. Not that it matters, really - could've been willy shaped for all I got out of it....
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 10:38, closed)

Kite nerd
Makes me sound like a bit of a kite nerd, but isn't that a box kite? Stunt ones are triangular usually.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 9 Apr 2008, 1:23, closed)

^ yep
you're right - twas a box kite.

They never built me the tree house they promised either....

*sniff*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Thu 10 Apr 2008, 12:00, closed)