Not me, my Dad
I love my dad. Infact when I grow up I want to be just like him, but not with the diabetes.

Anyho....one evening my dad had been out on the fizzy pop and had got himself a little worse for wear before coming home. Just before bed he's meant to inject himself with 10mg of slow acting insulin. However, being a little merry, he picks up the fast acting insulin (which you are meant to use 2mgs of) and jacks himself up with 10mg of daytime juice.

An hour later my mum gets worried, she can hear a knocking in the bathroom. Assuming it's my dad pottering around in his drunken state she shouts at him to come to bed. No answer, so she gets up to give him a piece of her mind, only to find him sat on the toilet, pyjamas round his ankles thrashing his hand in a bin. She calls him, prods him, waves a hand in front of his eyes but, but to all intents and purposes he's unconcious.

In a panic, my brother is got out of bed, the paramedics are called while my mum and brother try to get some sugar into dad. They don't know where he's put his glucose gel, they're shitting it knowing that he's getting worse by the minute, so grab a banana and mash it up into his mouth, trying to rub it onto his gums so that he'll get some sugar in his system.

The paramedics arrive and test for blood sugar whilst trying to communicate with dad. They cannot find a trace sugar reading, which is bad. Luckily they have the right kit, inject him and slowly he comes round. If they hadn't have turned up dad would have been in a coma most likely with permanent consequences. However, this is not the only lucky escape, as the paramedics said if that happened again, the quickest way to get sugar in his system would be to shove a Mars bar up his arse.

My Dad, horrified at this prospect, says "It's bad enough coming round on the toilet with your pants round your ankles, your mother rubbing banana all over my face and 2 green men staring into my eyes shouting "MonkeyDaddy! MonkeyDaddy!", without having a banan shoved in my fundament"

To which my mum replies, "You do that again and it'll be a bloody toblerone!"
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:19, 10 replies)

"the quickest way to get sugar in his system would be to shove a Mars bar up his arse"
I think paramedics have a sick sense of humour.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:26, closed)

It may have also been somethin my brother threatened my dad with
and during the panic was attributed to the paramedics
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:31, closed)

a late entry
But definitely a winner!
( SteamedCleaner, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:35, closed)

Really should have posted it sooner.
Also shouldn't have posted it a silly o'clock in the morning.
Ah well, I'll just have to shoe horn it into another QOTW another time, unless there's a sudden rush in clicks for me.
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:45, closed)

the winner
For sure...great story.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 8:48, closed)

Great story...
and reminds me of several occasions when my dad started 'going funny'

He was type 1 diabetic also, but as a 10 year old i didn't really comprehend what that meant. His ability to control his glucose levels got better, as did the quality of insulin.

It eventually was somewhat responsible for his death last october - well, that and the massive heart attack.
( Another_tragic_case wished he hadn't eaten all the cake, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 9:01, closed)

toblerone hehe
*clicks*
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 9:45, closed)

Best story ever.

(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 10:39, closed)

Hope your mum has glucagon injection kits for when it happens again
And cola would work quicker but that'd be less fun than a mars bar....
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 14:19, closed)

quicker acting, yes!
But have you ever tried to clean up a cola enema?
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 21:10, closed)