hmm
I wont talk about mine; too many people here know me. But what i will talk about is a girl i will call Audra (maybe cos that was her name). This was 6 years ago. ish.

After about a week of rampant pummeling i was becoming bored with the same old vanilla routine so decided to introduce her to some kink. Some saran wrap (thats cling film for us brits) helped a lot and, mid cunnilingus, i decided to introduce her to the zen art of humpy-fist. Well Audra was already a bit of a screamer (much to the chagrin of my apartment neighbours - but fuck it it *was* san fran after all) but yon fist seemed to drive her nuts. I could reduce her to a quivering wreck who would eventually wriggle off the bed away from me and cower in the corner panting and near passing out. Soon, i introduced a new aspect, i made her hold a small mirror just above her mimsy so she could watch me, in graphic detail, destroying her 20 year old tightness with wanton joy. That seemed to be the ticket, she loved it and decided she was "my bitch." She begged me outright to "keep" her forever. One trip to san frans "stormy leather" later, and shes prancing round my place, sporting nothing but a ridiculously tight corset with her doggie collar, while basicly being my live in love slave (which also extended to dinner, washing, cups of tea and beer on demand). I couldnt complain - she had a massive rack, loved being recorded on tape being "abused" and watched them back on my sofa while furiously wanking (only with permission, of course)

This all lasted a paltry six months until I realised she was a psycho in other areas which I needed her not to be (work functions for example, she had no social skills and made me look a twat to my bosses quite a few times). We parted ways. It was hard for her but she just wasnt what i wanted. She still to this day, emails me every month and texts me even though im now 5000 miles away and will not be returning to that area for a long time. She loves to tell me in graphic detail what she gets up to with her squeeze at the time, and ill tell you some of it is beyond fetish - the things she will do to get blokes to try to satisfy her is mind boggling.

Im willing to auction her phone number to the highest bidder. fuck she'd probably get off on the idea. Proper slut.
(shamen Geekius Maximus, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 22:04, 6 replies)

phreep
well tell us about it then
(Zuffle farts silently in lifts then leaves the warm aroma, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 23:01, closed)

50p

(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 2:35, closed)

OOOH! Pick ME! Pick ME!
I live in San Fran, so I would actually use that number...
(grundig Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 4:21, closed)

we could have a b3ta whip round
(no pun intended)
then order her to pay us back.
(randomstupidname would really like this signature field to be bigge, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 15:41, closed)

I actually LOL'd!
I thought I was the only one obscene enough to do that!

Edit:
Is duty payable on importing a sex slave?
(sunray18, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 16:55, closed)

Unspeakable!
Sir, ye are the most depraved, sick, mentally distressed person that I can believe has ever walked this earth. What you did to this wee lass is beyond reproachable, and a definite breach to her fragile state of mind, having sent her into the deepest fathoms of mental sexual slavery possible. I cannot be but appalled to what you did to her.

Now, in just retribution to what you did to her, can I have her phone number - she must be really worth a shag :-)
(LazyScumbag, Sun 25 Oct 2009, 15:54, closed)