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This is a question First World Problems

Onemunki says: We live in a world of genuine tragedy, starvation and terror. So, after hearing stories of cruise line passengers complaining at the air conditioning breaking down, what stories of sheer single-minded self-pity get your goat?

(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:00)
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Another letter to the paper*:
"I think it's selfish that commuters travelling alone use the seats with tables for their laptops. Four people who don't know each other could all sit somewhere else and me and husband could sit their with our children. These people treat public transport like an extension of their office and it's not'.

No, it's not. And it's not an extension of your fucking living room either, take your children and fuck off to an off peak train if you want a table, otherwise shut the fuck up and deal with it like the rest of us.

*paraphrased, but as seen in The Evening Standard last year.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:18, 25 replies)
They put computer connections on trains
precisely so people can use them as extensions of their offices. So it's a strange complaint.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:37, closed)
They're not so I can wank on the move?
No wonder I get those looks.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:39, closed)
This has always been encouraged across the transport networks
There is always a wide variety of pornographic magazines available at train stations and service stations on the motorway too.
Er... I've heard.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:44, closed)
yeah, but they also have those big 'Do not wank and drive' signs on the Motorway.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:47, closed)
Bloody nanny state.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:48, closed)
Your problem is,
you haven't selected the 'In Private' mode on your browser.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:49, closed)
Don't quite know what that complaint is, to be honest.
It's perfectly possible to sit four people with laptops at a table like that.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:50, closed)
That's possibly a fault with my summary of the letter.
The complaint was that the person didn't want the table used by 4 indivdual people with laptops, because they wanted to use it so their family could all sit together.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:52, closed)
That's simple enough to solve, they can just book first class tickets and then choose which seats they want.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:55, closed)
Don't tell me.
I'm not the one doing the complaining. I'm the cunt that makes one of the mum and two kids move if they have tried to sit in such a way as to protects the window seat that they are not using.

And then demands they keep the space on the table in front of me clear for my laptop...
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:57, closed)
Ah, understood.
In that case, what an idiot. How dare people try and help the economy and work whilst on the move.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:09, closed)
Living up to the stereotype
I was on a train recently when a screaming harpy with three kids in tow came screaming into the quiet coach and ranted at a couple of people sitting in booked seats at a table that they should move because she needed the table for he family. Eventually the rightful occupants left, just for some peace and quiet.

The brats looked like fairly typical Connors, Jadens, Kadie-Lees, Shannons, that sort of thing. I don't know for sure, but I do know that the mother was indubitably, unmistakeably, and quite unsurprisingly, a Scouser.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:25, closed)
I wonder how many of us would have stood our ground?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:47, closed)
I have, but in a moment of cowardice backed it up
by way of a hearty throat gargling cough that could easily be mistaken for the beginnings of an infectious disease. They sought sanctuary elsewhere.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:52, closed)
I have and I do. I'm pretty stubborn about Public Transport. I will make you leave if you are in my seat, move your bags if they are on my table and basically act like the self righteous arsehole that I sometimes let show here too.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 13:13, closed)
I would have as well. Fuck her and her attitude.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 21:59, closed)
Not with mine.
It's got a 17.5" screen and keypad to match.

Which is nice.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:12, closed)
I'm on the move a lot, but laptops are bloody heavy. Galaxy Tab FTW.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:15, closed)
Spill yer beans there
big boy.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:18, closed)
Tell them that your saving it for a single parent and their two kids.
As they're more deserving of charity!
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:49, closed)
Were I in a position to get worked up about such a situation,
I would vent my frustration, not by writing to the papers, but by exercising less control over my children.

That said, I don't have a massively over-inflated sense of entitlement, so it's a moot point.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:49, closed)
You can add
People with prams and oldies to the list as well please.

If you've got a day trip to London, please avoid the busiest fucking commuter train.

The look on their desperate 'oh where am I going to sit now' face boils my blood.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 12:51, closed)
I go through Stratford in the evenings
The number of bloody shoppers from that new Westfield site lumbering on the train during the rush hour, laden with bags and complaining there's no-where for them to sit and spread out.

One even complained in a loud voice that "if a few of you sat together there'd be some seats in a row for us", as if we should heard ourselves down one end of the carriage just to suit them.

I'm the first to offer help if someone needs it, but fuck 'em if they try to demand it.
(, Tue 6 Mar 2012, 12:11, closed)
Stupid to have the tables in the first place, really.
Everybody would have them if they could. Better not to have them at all and squeeze in some extra seats for people to sit down.
(, Wed 7 Mar 2012, 8:28, closed)
On my trains, the tables are quite thin, and don't actually take up any more space. The seats are still the same distance apart as without the tables.

It just means you can't see the person's feet in front out you when you're treading on them.
(, Wed 7 Mar 2012, 11:41, closed)

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