Talking about your children at work
Strict limitations should be imposed on the length of time a person can talk about their kids in the workplace. A maximum of 2 minutes per day should be permitted. Yes I’m sure you’re thrilled about your son’s/daughter’s first words/steps/day at school/football match/asbo but please spare me the details because it bores me to fucking tears.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 8:58, 4 replies)

Weird thing about this
Me and the missus had a daughter 6 months ago, I have always been determined to not be one of these people who talks about their kids all the time.

This is great in theory, but everyone who comes to speak to me opens every coverstaion with "how's your daughter" and it's not just pleasantries, they actually want to know.
(ScousersPet, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 10:33, closed)

We obviously don't work together without realising it then :P
To justify my comments; every monday I have to deal with a full update of my line manager's son's football match over the weekend which goes on for a full 15 minutes and includes full details of every tackle he made, any goals he might have scored or assists he may have made and every poor refereeing decision that went against his team. I'm staggered that he could think I would really care.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 10:40, closed)

Your problem then
is solved far more easily.

Punch your line manager in the bollocks. Nobody else witters on like that.
(username failed moderation, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 12:03, closed)

Reply with the phrase
"I hope your child dies". That'll stop him.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 16:09, closed)