Weird American Foods
So I've been living in Florida for 7 years today! In that time I've faced all kinds of hatred for being a dirty forrunner, which could be due to all the red coat jokes I keep making.

Any way, a large portion (no pun intended) of the downright hatred* I've faced has been due to the rather poor reputation British food has. Personally I see nothing wrong with fish pie, beans on toast, lamb, hot dog sausages with scrambled eggs for breakfast, ketchup on French toast, the near-IV of tea I consume or the myriad of other things Americans find so grotesque.

So, in retaliation, here's a short list of American foods which really proves they shouldn't be allowed to sneer at Blighty grub:

The Monte Cristo Sandwich
Most commonly it's sliced ham, turkey and swiss and American cheese. Not too bad? It's sandwiched between French toast, fried, topped with icing sugar and served with jam. And chips.

Chocolate chip pancake-covered sausage. On a stick.
Enough said.

KFC's Double-Downs
Previously mentioned, not really that bad as far as flavours go, but just morally wrong.

Corn dogs
Mini hot dogs fried in corn bread batter. On a stick.

Grits
Kind of like porridge but made from corn meal, grits are like a weird gelatinous grey matter which contain no flavour whatsoever. I've tried many ways of eating these (they come as a free side in a lot of breakfast places and I always forget to tell them not to bother) - some people like them sweet, some people like them savory and mix in butter and/or salt and pepper, one girl cut her bacon and eggs into little pieces then poured the grits over it. I like mine in the bin. I'm assuming the gloopiness of grits is the only reason they're not served on a stick.

That said, I am shocked England and Saudi beat America to hot dog stuffed crust and burger-docking-station-crust pizzas.



*Might be more playful banter than downright hatred (in fact I've been nothing but welcomed by the vast majority :) )
(Mr_Lew, Tue 2 Jul 2013, 23:36, 16 replies)

I tried a corn dog once, absolutely vile
I like the sound of that double down burger, though I'd probably feel ashamed of myself once I'd finished it
( Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 1:33, closed)

Yeah
They do that
(Mr_Lew, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 4:52, closed)

I had some pretty reasonable food in Florida
Although I was on expenses so it was all fancy-ish restaurants.

My favourite part about fancy-ish restaurants in Florida was the number of people washing down their fancy-ish food with half a gallon of coca cola.

Their coffee is shit though. I had to practically go to Cuba to find a decent strength brew.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 7:47, closed)

Fancy restaurant in Atlanta
Rest of my table and those either side of us were silenced by me ordering a bottle of wine.

"A whole bottle?"
( chthonic, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 11:56, closed)

Hahahaha
Rock on.

I'm a member of a very high-class business club in Orlando and their restaurant is absolutely amazing I will say, but you have to pay for it. Other than that if it did have flavour, it'll have been fried away long ago
(Mr_Lew, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 4:14, closed)

"I think something just came on your plate"

...was my involuntary reaction on first seeing grits.

I haven't seen anything since to change my view.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 10:13, closed)

Watching the presenters of Man v Food, and Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, rave about clearly rubbish food,
has somewhat tainted my opinion of American cuisine. Watching Bitchin' Kitchen just broke my brain.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 11:15, closed)

that fucking woman is unwatchable

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 18:31, closed)

Yum.
Like that Monte Cristo sandwich.
(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 17:11, closed)

The one thing I will say
Is the Americans know how to cook a fucking steak. None of this 6oz grey bit of gristle on your plate (if you go large it's a whole 8oz! That's a cowgirl cut where I live now). I'm talking 16-32 oz of hardcore, perfectly cooked dead cow that this country has perfected the cooking of.

Anyone who ever visits Orlando, take a 45 minute drive south on the I4 to Texas Cattle Co. in Lakeland. Ask for Colin to serve you (not that that effects the steak but he's sound as a pound) and you will not be disappointed.

I feel this needs to be put on the main QOTW an not in the replies though, hold on...
(Mr_Lew, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 4:17, closed)