b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Iffy crushes » Post 1387230 | Search
This is a question Iffy crushes

Who would you like to have sex with who isn't probably top of everyone's list and why?

(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 14:54)
Pages: Latest, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, ... 1

« Go Back

Hugh Lennon (is not my crush)
Hugh Lennon later became vaguely well known for Hypno-Dog, but back in 1992 he was just a jobbing hypnotist doing the Student Union Bar rounds. If I recall, his show was free as part of my Fresher's Week (along with a ticket for The Pogues featuring Joe Strummer, brilliantly) which is why I ended up watching. I watched my heavy metal freak new flatmate prove that he knew all the words to 'Bad' along with most of the dance moves. In fact, being a skinny, weird looking white bloke dressed head to toe in black, he looked uncannily like the real thing. I watched a girl I don't know eat an onion like it was an apple and a couple of guys get electric shocks everytime they sat on their chairs. And then I watched Mai, the Malaysian Medical Student, as he was taken to the front of a stage, put in his trance and told he was in a room and no one else could see him and to describe his surroundings. What followed, while hilarious to me at the time, is what has left me with a lifelong distaste for stage hypnotism, because it's fucking cruel. Mai described a bedroom, described being tied down on a bed. Hugh Lennon said something like 'Your ideal woman has just walked in, can you tell us who is there with you?'. And we laughed, cruelly and spitefully when he answered 'Virginia Bottomly'.

I think that would have been hard enough to live down as the first impression you make on 250 of your fellow fresher's. But Hugh wasn't done with the nastiness, not by a long shot.

'And what is (snigger) Virginia Bottomly doing?'

'She's pushing a broom handle up my bum'.

Poor, poor Mai.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 14:37, 13 replies)
Brilliant story!
I was getting a bit tired of all the one-liners this week. Well done, chap.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 15:14, closed)
He also
was at my freshers week in Hull.

One of the girls from my halls went up and proceeded to make a horrible fool of herself and let a few hundred of us see some of her genuine fears. It was so horrible that everyone just told her she was very funny and it was never spoken of again.

It confirmed for me the fact that I never want to be hypnotised.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 15:27, closed)
Go on, don't leave us in suspense
It was all a long time ago, you can tell us now.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 15:47, closed)
It was a fair while ago, I can't remember in too much detail.
This story does not go where you think it does. It's not some horrible repressed memories she had.

First - Helene - She was a tiny, greasy, purple clad monster who lived on bacon and nothing else. She tried so, so hard to be popular but it seemed impossible to like her.

It was drawing towards the end of the hypnotists performance and there were three or four people on stage. Their final task was to tell everyone about a special power they had.

I remember one of the guys believing that he was superman and telling us about how he could fly around and was really strong etc. Anyway, eventually it was the turn of Helene. She told the following story:

One day I got home from school and shouted "Hello!", but no-one replied to me. This was a bit odd so I started looking around the house to see where everyone was. No-one was on the ground floor so I started up the stairs and shouted "Hello!!!", still no-one answered me.

I looked around upstairs but still there didn't seem to be anyone there until I came to my parents room where the door was closed. I went to knock on the door but my hand went through it. I was a ghost! I walked through the door and my parents were asleep in their bed. I tried screaming to wake them and I can scream really loud. [at this point Helene screams at the top of her lungs]. I screamed for my mum [screams for mum at top of lungs]. I screamed for my dad at the top of my lungs [screams for dad at top of lungs], but no-one could see or hear me.

At this point the hypnotist woke her up and she wandered through the stunned audience and sat back with us.

Now, I know this story doesn't seem too bad. However, sitting there, hearing her essentially reveal how she feels alone and isolated and the sheer terror she managed to put into the screams for her mother and father was absolutely horrible.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 16:18, closed)

(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 20:30, closed)

Why would you feel bad? Surely they were paid handsomely to put on this performance?
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 16:42, closed)
I'm not sure if you don't understand the story
or if I don't understand your comment.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 16:45, closed)
It's spelt
skeptic, and in this case, given the amount of actual work done by pre-eminent psychiatrists and psychoanalysts in the field of hypnotism, is entirely unwarranted.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 17:23, closed)
Ah! Thank you.

(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 17:29, closed)
I always thought it was spelt 'sceptic'
Googled, and it turns out the yanks spell it with a k. You live and learn
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 19:15, closed)
Spelling everything like your the scriptwriter for Mortal Kombat,
must seem pretty cool when you're twelve, but it's no way to formulate a written language for use in the real world.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 19:45, closed)
Creepy Hugh
I met him once when I was about 14. My late stepdad had an agency booking stage acts for working mens clubs and he visited with his hypnotic dog and girlfriend.

What a creepy cunt. He was like Cliff Richard on LSD. The uni gigs explain why his bird was in her early 20s while he was wrong side of 50. We suspected he had her 'under' as the poor lass looked like she'd just smoked a quarter.
(, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 17:45, closed)
He did Leeds University last month
I saw him myself there as a fresher back in 1987. He must be in his seventies now.
(, Wed 12 Oct 2011, 10:43, closed)

« Go Back

Pages: Latest, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, ... 1