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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 62, 61, 60, 59, 58, ... 1

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What sort of poo is both in a box and not in a box?
Schrödinger's scat
(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Mon 22 Dec 2025, 22:28, Reply)
Which theoretical physicist enjoys a warm Polish soup?
nils borscht
(I helped save b3ta! Octo I ruin everything., Mon 22 Dec 2025, 20:04, Reply)
Which massive Saudi building project exhibits the Doppler effect?
nnneeeeeEEEEEOOOOoooommmmm
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Sun 21 Dec 2025, 0:46, Reply)
Which 2008 Ron Howard movie tells the story of a series of interviews between a snowman and one of Santa's reindeer?
Frosty/Vixen
(electricgoose, Thu 18 Dec 2025, 16:40, Reply)
How did Sarah Connor know the Gladiators Live show was coming to town?
There's a Storm coming
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 17 Dec 2025, 6:44, Reply)
Why was Sarah Connor disappointed with John Connor's external school activity?
Because there was no fete but what they make.
(I helped save b3ta! Octo I ruin everything., Tue 16 Dec 2025, 9:39, Reply)
Ask any cobbler and they'll tell you
that they have specialist equipment for making footwear for Sus Domesticus, just in case.

That way if times are truly desperate they can sell
piggy shoes
(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sat 13 Dec 2025, 22:20, Reply)
When does a mollusk do their shopping?
In the January snails.
(I helped save b3ta! Octo I ruin everything., Tue 9 Dec 2025, 13:22, 1 reply, 2 weeks ago)
Which sea saves fish and chip shops time and money?
Battersea
(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Mon 8 Dec 2025, 22:30, Reply)
Which ocean is always there for you?
The consistensea.
(I helped save b3ta! Octo I ruin everything., Mon 8 Dec 2025, 9:55, Reply)
Which green-skinned creature in The Lord of the Rings threatened the Fellowship that they'd face an "army of me"?
a Bjöblin
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 15:40, 1 reply, 3 weeks ago)
Which tennis player was Venus Williams as a boy?
Björn Björk
(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 13:09, 1 reply, 3 weeks ago)
Which venue, which hosts the UK Snooker Championship, is oh so quiet?
The Björk Barbican Centre
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sun 7 Dec 2025, 12:54, Reply)
The biggest joke of all
is that in the years since rob abandoned this place after banning a bunch of users for having the temerity to write some jokes, it's now the most thriving, vibrant and creative section of b3ta.com left standing.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 3 Dec 2025, 9:17, 4 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
Daniel Defoe's character named Flanders was well known for flashing her bits to titillate men.
You do the fucking punchline.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 3 Dec 2025, 9:06, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
In a move to help the Empire appear less evil Sith Lords are to be issued with non-deadly weapons.
Maul Tasers
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 2 Dec 2025, 14:26, Reply)
Have a couple of whiskies to take the edge off things.
Malt easers
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 2 Dec 2025, 11:21, 1 reply, 3 weeks ago)
At this time of year shopping can be harassing so its a pleasure to meet the gents selling a lovely fir to bring some greenery into your home
Yes, everyone looks forward to the Christmas treat offered by Mall Tree Sirs
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Mon 1 Dec 2025, 14:31, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
Don't think about confectionary, instead ponder the simple workings of small hand-held pincer-like instruments
Not chocolates, mull tweezers
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 1 Dec 2025, 13:04, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
The actor who played Kojak used a laser to prevent large reptiles from damaging the road payment station barrier articulation point.
Telly's Croc ray toll hinge

So solly
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 29 Nov 2025, 22:41, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
American multinational confectioners develop new product to relieve the stress when your dog starts losing its fur..
Moult easers.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Sat 29 Nov 2025, 19:11, Reply)
Delivery of soft limestone cargo on canal boats to Cumbria seaside resort gets delayed.
Wherries chalk late to Grange.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Sat 29 Nov 2025, 19:06, Reply)
Camila was very upset at her marriage to Prince Charles because there was STILL so much to do.
Teary Chuck A Lot Arrange
(I helped save b3ta! Octo I ruin everything., Sat 29 Nov 2025, 19:05, Reply)
The reverend William Archibald Spooner developed a system of using small red fruits to gather information about larger fruits.
Cherries to collate orange
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Sat 29 Nov 2025, 17:18, 2 replies, latest was 4 weeks ago)
British sweet manufacturer develops a spherical, segmented cocoa based confection, flavoured with the fruit from the genus rutaceae.
Terry's Chocolate Orange.
(Covid69 Boris variant., Fri 28 Nov 2025, 20:35, 1 reply, 4 weeks ago)
American standup comedian Jerry Seinfeld's diminutive fratboy friend is able to vocally project a specific vowel to an impressive distance
Jerry's Jocklet O Range
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 28 Nov 2025, 14:07, 2 replies, latest was 4 weeks ago)
British professional golfer Ted Ray (1877–1943) ran out of tinder, and had to ignite his Aga using the wooden wedge he used to stop his car from rolling down his steep driveway.
T. Ray's chock lit a range.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 28 Nov 2025, 10:37, 1 reply, 4 weeks ago)
Have you heard about the monument discovered in a town in south west Wales containing a ring of portals constructed from soft dense metal originally mined in Scotland?
Tenby's jock lead door henge
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 28 Nov 2025, 0:57, 2 replies, latest was 4 weeks ago)
How did people react to the news that a conservative prime minister had performed oral sex on a male pig?
Tories cocklicked boar retch
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 28 Nov 2025, 0:41, Reply)
Charles Palmer-Tompkinson's daughter used to run an exotic brothel for animal prostitutes. One Christmas she was up in court and was compelled to recount one of her aquatic charge's complete sexual history. It was
Tara's shark-harlot whorage
(Jingles McFuck ho bastard ho 🎅🎄🎁, Thu 27 Nov 2025, 21:10, Reply)

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