My job: Expectation vs RealityWhen I worked as a window cleaner, everybody - and I mean everybody - I knew asked me the "how's yer father" question. The truth was that I was always knackered and freezing, and the only nudity I saw was some fat bloke's arse. Tell us how your work differs from the expectation.
Thanks to Rotating Wobbly Hat for the idea
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 8 May 2014, 22:21)
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This one happened just last nightI'm at our SoftBall club's season launch and coaches/managers meeting as both a committee member and coach of my daughter's team.
A fellow committee member - I'll call him Reginald sidles up to me. I wouldn't say Reg is a mate per-se but we serve on a couple of committees together (PCYC and SoftBall), we've known each other since both our kids started school and we always have a long natter/argument at the PCYC Grounds Committee meetings (Fri. arvo shout at the pub after work).
He's one of those borderline aspy types who it seems frequently opens his mouth before his brain properly engages and applies a filter to what he's saying and how he's behaving in social situations.
Some of his past exploits include - jokingly calling the PCYC president a cunt during a funny situation at a meeting. When queried by the secretary if he really wanted to say that he affirmed it repeating that said bloke was a cunt and then laughing uproariously. Duly noted in the minutes...
At one of our Grounds Committee meetings I saw a former work-mate Ben, who happens to play prop for an A grade local club. After a bit of to-&-fro I tell Ben to "Get fucked you dumbshit" (a throwback to our days at work when we'd give each other shit at knockoff). Reg jumps in very aggressively and tells Ben "Yeah, FUCK OFF!!". I managed to intercede but not before Ben gave Reg a need to iron his lapels and probably check his undies.
So last night - I'm talking to Reg and he motions over to our (fairly well endowed) club secretary. "I'll never get tired of look at those tits." he says to me. In a voice easily loud enough for her to hear. And Reg's missus whom she happens to be speaking to at the time. And most of the rest of the hall.
I shake my head and Reg almost shouts "What? I'm a married man mate."
"Not for very much longer." I mumble as I wander off to get some more sushi and fresh lemon, lime and soda.
Length? I'd say she's a 33D and isn't afraid to open the buttons on her committee shirt enough to show off a bit of cleavage.
(, Sat 10 May 2014, 15:33, 9 replies)
b3ta.com/questions/twatfriends/post2103458
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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 10 May 2014, 16:55,
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It's all gone a bit meta.I don't know what to believe any more.
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Ghoti Fingers, Sat 10 May 2014, 22:17,
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cup sizes go up in twosthere's no 33D
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Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 10 May 2014, 17:31,
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Just ask him out, for fucks's sake!If you're that fucking obsessed by him at least tell him and he may reciprocate. I know it's not easy to be a teenager but you'll get through it.
(, Sat 10 May 2014, 18:31, closed)
I thought it was Sob Carehome. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 10 May 2014, 19:22,
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I was going to post and say it couldn't have happened last nightbecause you posted something damn near identical a few QOTWs back.
But then I realised I can't be arsed getting on the "jump on Rob Fairholme" train.
(, Sat 10 May 2014, 21:02, closed)
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